Family
by ollie-oxycotyn
Summary: Hansen Matthews grew up to learn that family is not blood, but who you make of it. And she'll do anything to protect it. 3.10.11 new chapter added, finally!
1. Prologue

A/N: This is my first published fanfic. It's from the movie Death Sentence, which is an awesome movie! Reviews of any kind are welcome!!

Disclaimer: I do not own Death Sentence, or any characters featured in this story with the exception of Hansen Matthews. Please, do not sue. It's all in good fun.

* * *

I had just flicked my cigarette over the edge of the balcony when someone came up behind me and grabbed me by my upper arms, pulling me back against them. I sucked in a sharp breath, not frightened but excited. I knew who was behind me, I knew what strong arms were holding me, just like I knew every square inch of the body that was pressing against me.

"You're home early," I said, leaning my head back, taking in everything about him at this moment. The smoothness of his clothes contradicted by the roughness of his unshaven chin pressed against my temple, the way he held my arms pinned down, not tightly enough to kill circulation, but still firmly.

And the way he smelled. I fell in love with him because of that smell. Sweet cigar smoke and some cologne I never knew the name of, along with, on these nights, expensive liquor. Tonight was whiskey. I could practically smell the Jack Daniels and Jim Bean seeping through his pores.

"Maybe I didn't wanna pay for somethin' I could get for free," he whispered, releasing his grip on m arms, but then wrapping his arms all the way around me, still pinning me to him. He leaned down and kissed my neck, leaving a trail down to my shoulders.

"Or maybe you already did and you're just lookin' for seconds," I challenged. "I can smell that cheap stripper perfume all over you."

"Never," he said seriously, then added "Never ever," more softly, nibbling on my ear lobe lightly.

I laughed at his teeth's tickling touch. "Good," I told him. He loosened his grip a little and I took the opportunity to turn around, to see his face, but I was still trapped. It wasn't my place to break free, that was the game he was playing tonight.

"You know why, right?" he asked. "Why you're the only one?" I loved the nights he got drunk, he got sweeter and sweeter to me with every drink.

"Tell me," I pleaded. "Please?" I went to stand up on my toes, trying to steal a kiss. He moved his head back farther. Denied. It wasn't my turn yet.

"Because of this," he said, leaning down to kiss my necklace. When he started in his gang, he gave me this necklace, one he had been wearing for years. An Irish knot, a symbol of protection. "Because you keep me safe."

It had become his ritual now. Every time he left the somewhat safe confides of our little two-bedroom apartment, I'd meet him at the door. He'd look at me and kiss the necklace once, kiss me once and then leave.

"I will always keep you safe," I told him, smiling and laying my head on his chest.

"Speaking of safe," he started. "I thought I told you not to stand so far out on the balcony?" He looked down at me through slanted eyes.

"You did," I agreed, "but I don't like to cloud up the apartment with my cigarette smoke unlike _some _people with their cigars."

"I don't care," he told me without pausing. I have to keep you safe."

In a split second he had his arm wrapped around one leg and hoisted me over his shoulder. I laughed in between yelling for him to put me down and beating my fists on his back. He ignored me, walking with such purpose, as if I was his hostage and he was a soldier at war.

He walked into the bedroom where he gently placed me on the bed. I watched as he shrugged off his coat, placing it with care over the back of the chair. Then watched as he removed his shirt. I took in a sharp breath, biting my lip, smiling. I would never tire of looking at his body.

He leaned onto the bed, starting to kiss my stomach, moving upwards, pushing up my shirt until it was just above my rib cage and then moved up to lay kisses on my neck, sucking on the curve where my neck turned into my shoulder.

He started to come up close to my mouth, then pulled away, teasing me more. I moaned, complaining. He was driving me crazy, not letting me kiss him.

He laughed at my protest, bringing his knees to either side of my hips, pinning me in place once again. He stared into my eyes as he ran both hand up the sides of my crumpled up tank top, then lifted it off all together, throwing it into some obscure corner. He stared down at my half naked chest, smiling an evil smile.

I smiled back, placing both hands on his shoulders, pulling myself up to him. He held me tightly to him, burying his face in my hair, inhaling deeply.

Then he pulled my hands off of him, holding me by my wrists, gently but firmly, pinning my arms down. He used one hand to pin both of my wrists while the other undid the drawstring of my pajama pants. Finally he leaned down, kissing me deeply.

-----------------------

I woke up a few hours later, hearing banging on the door. Billy was asleep still, his arm draped around me.

"Billy," I whispered, turning over a little. "Billy, someone's beating at the door."

He grumbled a little, turning the other way. I rolled my eyes, grabbing the sheet off the bed and wrapping it around myself.

"Fine, " I said, faking aggravation. "I'll go get the door."

I looked through the peep hole. Nothing.

"Who is it?" I yelled.

"It's Joe," they slurred. "Open the damn door, Hansen."

I laughed, unlocking the five locks we had and opening the door. Joe sat in the doorway, head lolling around drunkenly. He looked up at me and my toga-by-bed-sheet ensemble.

"Well," he said with a laugh. "So that's why my brother left so early. Was wondering where he went off to."

I rolled my eyes, shaking my head at the drunken mess on my doormat.

"Billy!" I yelled. "Come pick up your drunk brother and get him to his bed before I leave him to sleep in the doorway."

I heard Billy laugh all the way from the bedroom. He came around the corner, wearing a pair of boxers. He came over to me, wrapping his arms around my waist and laughing at his brother.

"So are you gonna get him up or should I just lock him out?" I asked Billy. Billy sighed and helped his brother off the floor.

Throwing one of Joe's arms around his shoulder, the two brothers made their way to Joe's room to deposit the kid on his bed, as I followed and watched as Billy covered up his kid brother, removing his shoes and jacket.

"It's times like these that aren't you glad that we invited Joe to come live with us?" I asked. Billy laughed at me. "Now, after all this excitement, I have no idea how I'm going to ever get back to sleep, Mr. Darley. Any ideas?"

"A few, " he told me, lifting me up, threshold style and carrying me down the hall to our room.

-----------------------

After we were done and Billy was passed out again, I rewrapped my sheet around me and went back to the balcony to have a cigarette. I know Billy didn't like me out here, but I hated that after-smoke smell and being out on the balcony made me relax.

I sat in one of the dollar store folding camping chairs we had out there, thinking back on how I had arrived here in this two-bedroom apartment on the wrong side of the tracks, living with my long time boyfriend and his little brother, both well-known gang members and drug dealers.


	2. The Way We Came To Be

**So, here is the second chapter. Hope you like it. Please review!!**

**Disclaimer: Blah, blah, blah, don't own Death Sentence or any of its characters. And yes, I invented Hansen, so I claim her. Hibiddy-hooplah. **

* * *

_I sat on the front steps of the group home, reading some random book, not really paying attention to it. My attention had been stolen today, just like every other day out on these steps. I looked up from the edge of my book, watching the car repair shop across the street. _

_He stood outside, shirtless, head bowed under the hood of some beat-to-shit car. He was there everyday, at Bones Darley's place. And everyday that I could, I'd sit and watch. Today was different though. He was mad today, slinging parts around, throwing shit and not caring where it landed. _

_His dad was most likely the cause of his troubles. Bones Darley was not a nice man, coming around him, yelling all the time. And when the yelling didn't seem to take an effect, I had seen him do far worse things. The two Darley brothers lived with him above that heap of a car shop and at night when I sat out on the roof, I could see them through the windows. _

_On most days when Billy saw me sitting on the steps, he'd nod. No smile, no wave, just a slight movement of his head, letting me know that he was aware. Today, though, his anger had seemed to change a lot of things about him, because today, he talked to me._

_His dad came from out of the office and threw a backpack at him and yelled something I couldn't hear, pointing off in some obscure direction. Billy stared at the ground while putting on a black t-shirt, and then started to walk away, his father smacking him on the back of the head before retreating back to the office. _

_He walked out of the gates, and looked up at me. Instead of nodding as usual, he stared for a moment as I stared back, too startled to rip my eyes away. Then he came across the street, stopping on the sidewalk in front of the house, not coming into the yard. _

_He was quite a site up close, a mop of dirty blond and brown hair, eyes that could pierce metal. Skinny, but muscular, and a stance that could intimidate anyone. A hard exterior seemed to radiate off of him and he stood there, cigarette hanging limply from one side of his mouth. _

_He removed the cigarette, holding it between his index and middle finger, the backpack his father had thrown at him was slung over one shoulder. _

_"Hey," he said. _

_"Hey," I replied, shutting my book. We continued to stare until he broke our eye contact, looking me up and down instead. Finally, he seemed to decide on something. What it was, I'll never know, but to this day I'm glad he decided it. _

_"You wanna go for a walk?" he asked._

_I didn't hesitate for a second. "Sure," I told him, leaving the book on the steps. Technically, at the home, we're not supposed to leave, but I didn't care. What could they do to me? Once you hit the group home, there was nowhere left to go._

_We walked in silence for a few blocks, him just breathing, smoking, staring straight ahead. Me, just staring at my feet and trying to keep up with his long steps, sneaking glances at him. I kept trying to think of things to say, things that wouldn't give away my watchful eyes. But nothing came. We just kept walking._

_We walked until we were near the highway, walking underneath the overpasses, a well known drug hotspot. We stopped under one of them and he looked around, taking a second to study everyone's face until he found the one he was looking for. _

_He motioned for me to stay a ways back while he talked to the other guy, a boy just around his age. Billy opened up the backpack, showing the other the contents. Finally, the other nodded, opening his pack and watched as Billy took out a brown paper bag and deposited inside the boy's bag while placing a large amount of cash inside Billy's. That was my first drug deal._

_Billy walked away, waving for me to join him, heading back in the direction we came. _

_"So," he finally said. "I see you everyday and I have no idea who you are. What's your name?"  
_

_"Hansen," I told him. _

_"No last name, Hansen?"_

_"Hansen Matthews according the birth certificate that was dropped off, along with me, to the home. Not that having a last name makes a difference. It's just an empty word to fill in the blank spot on paperwork," I told him. I had said this speech many times, coming up with this conclusion in 1st grade when it was "Heritage Week" at school._

_"Pretty bleak outlook for someone so young," he said. I looked over at him, as he looked back at me. He had a small shadow of a smirk on his features. _

_I shrugged. "Sixteen's not so young," I told him. "Not 'round here."_

_"I'm nineteen," he told me. "How old does that make me?"_

_"However old you feel," I told him. "So what about you? What's your take on this world in the nineteen years you been apart of it?"_

_"'Bout as bleak as yours," he said with a small laugh that had no effort behind it._

_And that was it, that was where we became friends. Everyday he'd pick me up at the steps to do errands with him. At nights I would sneak out to go to parties with him. If he was outside working on his car, I would walk over there and sit on a chair, just talking or reading._

_His younger brother, Joe, would come with us a lot, never wanting to be home with Bones. After being with them a while it became evident that Bones was more of a boss than a father. To him, he was doing his fatherly duty by housing them and they did their job as sons being his errand boys. _

_"Lord knows I've been patient wit' the lot of yous," was always Bones excuse for the mistreatment of his two boys._

_Billy was more of the father-figure to his younger brother. He took care of Joe, always protecting him, always knowing where he was and who he was with. They were their own family and I loved to watch them take care of each other. _


	3. Whole New World

A/N: So sorry I took a while to update. I already have chapter 4 and part of 5 written, but I have to tweak them before posting. Thank you so much for reading!! Reviews are overly welcome, whether praising or criticizing!

Disclaimer: Don't own anything but Hansen Matthews, and whatever else I didn't steal from the movie Death Sentence which i am IN LOVE with. Instead of suing, you should rejoice in the fact that someone loves your work so much that they spend most of their time expanding on your idea!

* * *

_When we first started to hang out, I was very inexperienced in this world. With bouncing from foster home to foster hone, I had seen my fair share of drug use, but I never really was a part of it. But when Billy took me under his wing, I wanted to know everything._

_I asked Billy questions on top of questions, but getting a straight answer was the hard part. I was an uncorrupted porcelain doll in his eyes, never to know the skanky underbelly of his world. He let me in far enough so I knew more than just which end was up, but never much farther. I was a little kid playing in the shallow end of the pool while he waded in the deep waters._

_His perfect image of me may have not been true, or so I thought. I mean, I could draw my own conclusions when he told me someone mysteriously "moved outta town", but I didn't realize how little I knew._

"_Ever so protective," I used to tease. He look at me with a shadow of a smirk, a cocked eyebrow, then just shake his head._

"_Ever so naive," he'd counter._

_I never wanted to believe I was naive. I was hard-headed, stubborn, and still am. I guess you never really believe that you don't know everything until it smacks you in the face, or, in this case, nearly gets you a bullet in the shoulder. _

_It wasn't my first party, I had been to a few with him. All seemed normal at first: I knew some people, others I didn't. It centered mostly around the Them, the hometown gang, and other assorted guests. I didn't know who's house it was, just a crappy one-bedroom, like all the others around this area._

_There was a different drug being used in every corner of the house, and from what I had gathered, the guy who lived here was a needle-freak himself. I wasn't much into drugs, a toke or two from a joint every now and again, but nothing more serious than that. Unless you counted cigarettes, I was a goddamn chimney when it came to cancer sticks._

_Anyway, we weren't really there for the party, Billy had to stop by to talk to his good friend Bodie about some information he had gotten from some smack-head that he dealt to earlier that day. I mostly just sipped a beer all night, standing at the counter in the kitchen with Billy._

_Suddenly, I heard what sounded like a group of cars backfiring, but when the sound of shattering glass followed, I knew it wasn't any car. Before I knew what was really going on, someone had grabbed my arm and pulled me onto the ground. _

_I laid flat on my stomach with my hands covering my head, face half buried in the fake tile of the kitchen, one eye still looking around. It was Billy who had pulled me to the floor. He was next to me, sitting up, the two of us behind the bar in the kitchen. _

"_Stay down," he commanded, pulling out a gun from his waistband and leaning over the counter, looking to see his path was clear, then firing a few times. Tears welled up in my eyes. This was my first encounter with live gunfire, and truth be told, I was scared shitless. _

_After a few moments, all blasts of gunfire came to a close. I still remained where I was until I got the okay from Billy, who hadn't put his gun back. I looked around at the rest of the room. Glasses lay in pieces, punctures from bullets in all the furniture and walls. After making sure everyone was fine, Billy said his good byes to certain people and him and I made our way to his car down the street._

_We got into the car, driving in silence to our corner of town. He pulled into the fence of his father's shop and turned off the engine. I reached for the door, ready for out nightly farewell, but he touched my arm, holding me back for a moment. _

"_Are you okay?" he asked as I turned to face him. _

NO!_ is what I wanted to scream, but instead I just put on a fake smile and nodded my head. He stared at me for a moment, seeing through the smile and the nods. I changed direction then, shaking my head furiously, smile fading from my features. Tears started to fall, silently and without stopping. _

"_Whoa," he said softly, trying to brush away the tears as fast as they were coming down. "What's the matter?"_

"_Nothing," I whispered, backing away a little, wiping my own tears. _

"_You were scared," he said, more like a fact than a question. I nodded, continuing to wipe away tears. There was just no end to them. I didn't even know why I was crying. I really was just a baby._

"_C'mon," he said suddenly, getting out of the car. I followed him, getting out of the car. _

"_Where are we going?" I asked, following him back towards the shop rather than going across the street to my empty bunk bed at the group home. _

"_Just to have a cigarette on the roof," he said simply, shrugging._

_We climbed to the roof of the two story shack that they lived in, and he handed me an already lit cigarette. I sat down and he came to sit behind me, putting a leg on either side of me and wrapping an arm around my waist. It was a position that he had adopted, and he sat the same way every time he sat with me. I loved it, to have a such a familiar gesture with somebody. I had never had that before._

_I leaned back into him, resting my head on his shoulder. "You were right," I told him, blowing out a stream of smoke. "I was scared."_

"_I can tell. You're still shaking." I closed my eyes, trying to relax a little. "It's gonna be okay. Promise." _

"_I know," I told him, and it was true. I knew everything was going to be fine. No one died and I had an uneasy feeling that this wouldn't be the last time that I was apart of unsuspecting gunfire, but for the moment, I was still scared. "I just... I was just scared."_

"_You're not used to this world," he whispered. "And maybe you shouldn't be."_

"_Please don't," I said to him. "Don't push me away."_

_He pulled me to him, hugging me harder. "I wouldn't be holding you this close if I was going to push you away." He placed a light kiss on my temple, and I could feel myself stop shaking. _

"_Why don't you just stay here tonight?" he said suddenly, casually. I looked up at him, my eyebrows raised in a joking way. "Not like that, silly girl. Just stay here. We'll hang out again tomorrow. I'm not leaving you by yourself tonight, not like this." _

_I nodded, not bothering to pick my head up off of his shoulder. We finished our cigarettes and threw them over the roof, climbing off of the roof to head back inside._

_It was the first time I had seen his room. It was just a room, nothing personal about it. I was used to rooms like this, having had a few of my own. The walls were blank, painted a white that had faded into dingy long ago. There were two twin beds, one along either wall. Clothes thrown here and there. _

"_Nothin' special," Billy said. Seeing his room, I realized that, to him, this was not home. Just a place to crash. He may have had the same roof over his head his whole life, but we were still one and the same: homeward bound kids, just looking for where we belonged. _

_He handed me a t-shirt and pair of boxers that I changed into. Joe was passed out on one bed while Billy and I climbed into the other. I faced him and he looked at me. _

"_Just sleep," he said to me quietly and I closed my eyes. I then felt his strong arms wrap around me and for the first time that I could remember, I felt a strange feeling of contentment. It took me a minute to figure out what the name of this feeling was and then it came to me: I felt safe. Safe in his arms and I knew that from that moment, I would never feel that way again unless his arms were around me. _

_The next morning, I woke up to the same strong arms and felt the same safety inside his embrace. I smiled to myself, Billy still sleeping. It was sometime early in the morning, the sun hadn't made it all the way up yet, but there was still some light outside._

_Much to my own argument, I knew I had to get going, go back to my empty bunk bed at the group home across the street. I very carefully tried to snake my way out of his safe grasp. I just loved thinking of it that way: _Safe._ I felt like a toddler with a new toy, I had never known this feeling before. _

_I was till smiling to myself as I pulled out of his embrace, collecting my clothes from the ground and slipping my shoes back on._

"_Where you off to?" I heard from behind me. I looked back to see Billy, now lying on his back, his eyes still closed. I smiled to myself and walked back over to the bed._

"_I've gotta go back," I whispered. He nodded. "I'll see you later?" Another nod. _

_Later that day, he picked me up and drove me in the half-finished car out to a field. He walked out to a rickety fence, placing some old liquor and beer bottles he had pulled from the floor in his back seat. _

_"Now," he said, walking back over to where I stood, "I was thinkin' that maybe this would help you feel better prepared for times like last night."_

_With that being said, he then pulled out the handgun from the waist band of his jeans._

"_This a Beretta," he told me. "Nine millimeter. Not the best to learn on, but probably the one that you'll have on ya if needed. Gimme your right hand."_

_I did as he said and he pressed the gun into my palm. He came to stand behind me, wrapping his hands over mine as I held it. As I looked at the object in my hands, I was more enthralled then frightened and the only butterflies I had were from him holding on to me. _

"_Now wrap both hands around it, don't put your finger over the trigger yet," he whispered into my ear. I could feel his warm breath and it sent chills down my spine, making me shaky, but I followed his instructions precisely. "Get a feel for it. Now, when you're comfortable, put your finger over the trigger."_

_I took a deep breath, trying to regain my composure, hoping he wouldn't notice. This wasn't the first time he had sent chills running through me, making me nervous and excited all at the same time. I took in another deep breath and then gently placed my finger through the hole, resting it over the trigger._

"_Okay, when you fire, the gun's gonna jump back a little, don't be scared. If you're scared, you could accidentally fire again. Only fire when you're ready. You control the gun." I nodded slightly, not trusting my voice, and he raised my arms up, completely straight, moving his hands back to my wrists, holding them up to help me keep it straight._

"_Stop shaking so much, you're gonna do fine," he whispered, thinking the gun was freaking me out. "Just make sure your elbows aren't locked, but your arms still firm." I did as I was told. "Aim for one of the bottles. Line it up in the viewer, and when you're ready just ease back the trigger. There's no need to be rough with it, just pull back gently." _

_Inhaling and holding it, I stared intently at the fist bottle in the row, trying to hold my ground as he told me. When I felt I had it locked in my sight, I pulled back the trigger. The shot came loudly and I missed the bottle, the bullet hitting a tree, scaring the birds out. The recoil hit me pretty hard, knocking my balance, but Billy stayed firm, catching me. _

"_That was good," he told me, trying to hide his smile. "When your ready, try again."_

_Another moment of gaining composure, then I squeezed again, this time hitting the bottle._

"_See?" he said. I could hear a smile in his voice, which put a smile on me, along with his praises. "You're a natural. Fire at will."_

_I squeezed off a few more, some hitting bottles, some not. When it was empty, Billy showed me how to reload. I watched carefully as he did the first couple, then filled the clip the rest of the way myself. _

"_This time," he told me as we prepared to go another round, "You're going to hold your own stance." He placed his hands on my hips as I raised my arms. I shot off the next round, faltering a couple of times, but getting the hang of it. _

_When the clip was empty again, Billy hugged me around my waist and told me I did pretty damn good for a first-timer. He took the gun from my hands, reapplying the safety button and placed it back in his waistband. As we got back into the car, getting ready to go, I asked him who taught him to shoot a gun._

"_Bones," he replied, lighting a cigarette. "He took me out to a spot like this when I was thirteen and told me that if he was gonna have me out totin' his shit across the city, there was no way he was gonna send me out unprotected. Not because of my safety, but for the safety of his packages."_

_Billy never referred to it as "drug dealing" but as "package delivering", at least when it came to me. It was as if it was his way of sheltering me just a little. He sometimes had me hold the cash on the times he made multiple drops, but never the drugs. _

"_He taught Joe, too, when he turned thirteen. His intentions may have not been right, but it's about the only good memory I've got of me and dear ol' dad." He laughed it off, but I could see it meant a lot to him to have that one memory. All he had ever had was Bones, apart from the times when Billy's mom was still around, but that was a long time ago. From all that I had gathered, she took off when he and Joe were pretty young. There one minute, gone the next morning. _

_He shook himself from his thoughts and looked back over at me. _

"_Anyway, I always carry two pieces on me," he said, switching the topic back to my education. "Then there's always one in the glove box." I nodded, taking all of it in. _

_My knowledge of guns then extended from knowing handguns to learning rifles and then shotguns. I had a slightly hard time with shotguns, resulting in half-dollar sized bruises on the insides of my upper arms, but I didn't care, I was always ready to learn. _

_He taught me more about guns than just to fire. If I was going to know how to use it, then I was going to know how to take care of it as well, is what Billy had told me. I was taught to clean, reload, store safely. _

_My education also stretched farther than just guns. I learned an extensive amount about drugs and dealing, gang signs and politics. Through Billy I was brought into a whole new world, but he maintained rules for me still: I could hold cash, not drugs. When told to stay in the car, do it. Don't talk to those with this tattoo or that tattoo. Don't tell anyone you can score them anything. Don't carry a piece unless I know I'm gonna need it. Don't go down these streets at certain times._

"_Never leave my drink unattended," I mimicked. "And don't accept candy from strangers."_

"_I'm fuckin' serious, Hansen," he said to me when I complained of his rules. "I'm not always gonna be standin' right next to you, holdin' your fuckin' hand."_

_I shut my mouth at those times, knowing he was right. I nodded in agreement. "I know," I told him. "You keep me safe."_

_Billy didn't have much to his life outside of the drugs, guns, and gangs, but what he did have was his younger brother Joe. _

_Joe was fourteen when I met him. I was sitting outside of Bones's shop, not long after I had just started to hang out with Billy, talking to him while he worked on his car. Joe then down the stairs leading from the house above, Bones yelling something at his retreating back, smacking him once on the back of the head. When he was sure that Bones was gone, Joe flipped him off, then walked over to us. _

"_Joe," Billy said to his brother, coming up from under the hood of his car, wiping his hands on a rag. "This is Hansen. Hansen, my little brother Joe." _

_Joe stopped in his tracks, looking me up and down, studying me. I studied him back. He was tall for fourteen, short brown hair on top of his head, he looked a lot like a younger version of Billy, but still very different. He had innocent eyes that had seen too much. He wasn't intimidating like his brother. Though he tried to look tough, he was too innocent. And I could tell he resented that._

_I don't know what he saw in me, but I felt a great sense of relief when he took the chair next to me, deciding that I was good._

"_Hey," Joe nodded, slouching comfortably in the lawn chair next to me. _

"_Hey," I said back, smiling at him._

_And that's all it took. From that day on, Joe was with us most of the time, Billy never left him at home with just their father. They had developed their own routine, their own family dynamic: Joe would come out with us, then take off with his own packages to deliver, or whatever else he did. He hung with the same crew as Billy, grew up with the same kids: Bodie, Spink, Heco, and other kids from the neighborhood._

_Through my many years of transferring from foster home to foster home, I had never had a true sense of "family". I was always an outsider, held at arm's length. Whether it was me who held myself there or someone else, the missing bond was always present. So it was natural for me to maintain this distance with my newfound friends, but in time, I was showed that this was where I belonged._

* * *

More coming soon, I promise!!

Thank you to:

XNegAttentionX: Thank you for the kind words and I can't wait to read more of Running Out of Love, I just read the new chapter!!

Maxiekat: Thank you for such an awesome review! Hope you like the new stuff! And I can't wait to go read your Outsiders stories! I just saw the movie for the first time yesterday, and I've started reading the book. _  
_


	4. Push Me AwayHold Me Close

**A/N: So here is ch. 4. It'll probably be a day or so before chapter 5, I'm not even finished writing it yet, whereas this one just needed tweaking. Will get it up as soon as possible.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything except Hansen. Don't sue, blah, blah.  
**

* * *

I checked my watch. Almost six a.m. I should really be getting back to bed. I had to work a shift at The Four Roses, a bar nearby that was a big hangout for this crowd. It was a little hole in the wall, named after the red stained glass picture of four roses tied with a ribbon.

Saying The Four Roses was in the bad section of town was presuming a good one existed. No, around here, the wrong side was every side, just varying degrees of "bad". It was always an interesting parade of characters going through there, a kaleidoscope of different gangs all coming through. This was their place to mingle, common ground in this town. But everyone knew who ran the joint: they did, The SBE, South Boston Executioners.

_Along with dealing shit for his dad, Billy and the other kids formed their own local gang, who were climbing up the ranks of fear in the area. It was what happened with mostly all the inner-city youth, no matter where you came from. They grew up together, graduating from errand boys to corner-keepers themselves, and the locals had given them a name. The South Boston Executioners. _

_Most of the territory that the SBE had originally came from Bones, who ran quite a lot in this town. Heroin was the drug of choice, along with gun-running and a few other specialties. Together, the SWE had turned an old abandoned mental hospital into a heroin factory, where great deals of the stuff could be cooked. _

_Upon initiation, Billy would the leader of the SBE, the one who had given them the errand jobs that had started them, the one who had helped stake out their ground. He wasn't the only kid I knew from the neighborhood that was apart of the SBE. His life-long pals Bodi, Spink, Heco, Tweak, and Jaime, were a few, along with other kids I had met here and there. They were all quite intimidating on their own, but together... It was quite a sight of fear._

_And it was a future that had been written long before I had come onto the scene, and it wasn't anything I was going to be able to change. Billy never really talked to me about it, I was just to accept it and hope the carpet wouldn't be ripped out from underneath me._

I walked back into the apartment, settling back into bed. His back was turned to me so I wrapped my arms around him, kissing his shoulder.

"You've been on the balcony again," he mumbled. "Cold hands."

I sighed, rolling my eyes and laid my head on his shoulder. "Just go back to sleep."

"I'm gonna fuckin' close that thing off with bricks and cement," he threatened.

"No," I whined. "You wouldn't do that. I love the balcony."

"Uhrg," he grumbled, turning over to face me. "You will be the death of me, ya know that?"

"Ever so protective," I teased.

"Ever so naive," he countered. I smiled innocently, making a smile appear for a split second. He closed his eyes, trying to go back to sleep again. I ran a hand over his shaven head.

"Are you ever gonna let it grow back?" I asked him quietly.

"Didn't know ya missed it so much," he whispered tiredly, not bothering to open his eyes.

_Billy pulled up outside the home, and I climbed into the passenger seat. I looked over at him, a drastic change had been made to his appearance. He had the goatee for a while now, but today he showed up with a completely shaved head._

_To me, the shaved head represented more than just a look that made him almost more good looking and twice as intimidating than before. To me, it was the SBE changing him. And that it was I feared: losing him to the person he was to become. _

"_So what ya thinkin'?" he asked me while sitting at McDonalds. We were at one of the outside tables. He was drinking a coffee while I picked at a hash brown. We sat on opposite sides of the table, me hugging my knee to my chest, the other leg swinging back and forth. We hadn't talked the whole way there. _

_I shrugged. "I think they're changing you," I told him. He sighed, flicking his cigarette aside._

"_Don't start, Hansen," he said exhaustedly. It had become a topic I had brought up often. He never gave me details of the inner workings, and not knowing killed me. Seeing the way it effected him killed me._

"_What?" I asked. "You wanted to know what I thought, I told ya. It's not like I'm gonna lie to ya." I glanced up at him as he sipped his coffee, staring back at me over the rim of the cup. I looked back down at my pieces of hash brown, picking at them again._

"_Don't start with this shit again," he told me. "This has nothin' to do with them." _

"_Bull shit," I called out. He looked up at me, annoyed. "What? You just out of the blue decided that you weren't intimidating enough to the people around here? You just had to go make yourself look twice as scary?" _

_I threw the pieces of food in my hands back on to the wrapper. I picked up his coffee and took a sip. I was never much of a coffee person, but my throat was pretty dry. He just kept staring at me with an aggravated expression. I looked anywhere but at him. _

"_Hey," he said softly. I ignored him, picking at a piece of torn plastic on the table._

"_Hey," he said again, deeper, commandingly. I looked up at him. He motioned for me to come sit over on his side of the table and I obliged, keeping a couple of inches between us. I couldn't help this, I was mad. The SBE was taking him away from me. This was a future I couldn't control and I couldn't bare to lose the one person in my life that seemed to give even a little bit of a damn about me._

"_They will not change me," he told me, as if reading my thoughts. Not that he would've had to been a mind reader, I had voiced my opinion about this whole thing many times._

_I closed my eyes and rested my forehead on his shoulder. _But they already are,_ is what I wanted to say, but I knew my limits and being this physically close to him was pushing all the right buttons. _

_My feelings for him had been developing over the time of knowing him, turning our friendship into my own secret crush. But I hated calling it a crush, it was more. Even if I always kept these feelings of mine to myself, I would always feel a need for him. He was all I had._

_I knew he was waiting for a response, but instead of saying anything, I just moved my head to the side, looking up at him, disbelieving._

"_Don't give me that look," he said, throwing a piece of my hash brown at me. I smiled, burying my face in his shoulder again. _

"_Hey," he said again, picking up my face in one of his hands. "Why ain't you telling me what's really up?"_

"_I'm afraid," I told him, never being able to lie to him. "I can't lose you. You and Joe are the only thing I've got." He lifted my face a little higher, then kissed me. Just a quick little kiss on the lips, his facial hair scratching my face in the best way. This was the first, and I hoped against all that it wouldn't be the last. Then he made it better, wrapping his arms all the way around me and I clung to him._

"_What was that for?" I asked when we pulled apart a little, an arm of his still wrapped around my waist, both of mine still resting on his shoulders._

"_Reassurance," he said simply. "Everything is going to be fine. You will not lose me. I'm always going to here. And I'll always protect you." _

_I smiled slightly. "Well, it didn't do shit for reassuring me," I told him and he shook his head at me. "But I liked it."_

"_All right, smart-ass," he said, kissing my temple. "You finished now? We got shit to do." I nodded and we got in his car and headed back to Bone's place. _

In the time since that first kiss, kisses had become like stolen prizes, secret pleasures. There were certain times I would get kisses: when he picked me up at the start of the day and when he dropped me off, but some were given when I least expected it. My favorite times were when he was drunk, due to his tendency to be a rather sweet drunk. His hard exterior crumbled the more his blood/alcohol level rose. This is when the kisses got deeper, becoming more than just lips pressed together, but tongues embracing and hands roaming.

We still remained "just friends", an unspoken term that we both knew, though he had no quandaries kissing me in front of other people, signifying me as a marked member of this society, I was not to be reckoned with. If ever there was a guy getting too close, be it at a party or waiting for him to get done with a deal, Billy would be there in a moment's notice, casually slipping an arm around my waist, placing a light kiss on my temple.

I let the topic of the SBE rest for the moment, knowing if I kept pressing, he would just get agitated. Instead, I just kept my fears to myself, the kisses helping to ebb my anxiety away, but not enough that I forgot completely.

Along with my fears of his future, his initiation was a whole other fret for me. He wouldn't tell me what it consisted of, but I had heard stories, and none of it had been nice. In some ways I had my suspicions of why he wouldn't tell me: I saw a somewhat different side of him than the front he put up to the rest of the people around here. My romantic side told me that he wouldn't give me particulars because he was afraid that I would look at him differently, wouldn't love him if I knew the gruesome things he had done. But I could never not love him.

_Billy parked outside of the home, dropping me off for the night. It had been a silent ride back from the party, his pre-initiation party. This was the night I feared the most, the night I knew would change him forever. And I feared most of all that it would change us._

_He leaned over to kiss me good night, but when he did, I wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him closer, not letting go. The kiss deepened a moment, then I finally let go, tears in my eyes that I was praying would not spill, hoping he wouldn't notice. I wasn't trying to give him grief, I was just scared._

_"What was that for?" he asked, a shadow of a smile playing on his lips. _

_"Because I love you," I told him quickly, meaning it more than anything in my life. "And because I want you to be safe. Come back to me in piece, okay?" _

_He kissed me once more, just a quick one. I nodded and exited the car, watching him drive back to where we had just left._

_A couple of hours had passed, and I still laid awake in my bed, staring at the one picture I had of Billy. It was taken a few weeks ago. It was Billy, Joe and I. The two brothers stood side by side, Billy with his arm around Joe's shoulder and I had jumped on Billy's back. Neither brother smiled, but I did. My face was practically glowing. _

_Sleep was a foreign notion at that time, and there was no more I could cry. The tears had finally spilled when I got into my bunk. Everyone else had been asleep when I snuck back in through my window, so there were no questions asked when I fell on the floor, sobbing. I cried because of whatever awful act Billy would have to perform, cried for what it would do to him, and cried mostly in fear of losing him. Now with all of the tears gone, I just sat there, awake, worried. Until I heard tapping on a window._

_My bunk was closest to the wall with the window on it, it was what I used to sneak out of the nights I went out with Billy. Only Billy wasn't at this window. I looked closer and realized it was Bodie, the closest thing you could call to Billy's best friend, almost a brother himself. He waved for me to come down. _

_I nodded, grabbing my already packed knapsack and climbing out of the widow and down the fire escape. I got into Bodie's car and he threw some clothes into my lap. I looked down at the small top and short leather skirt. _

"_I had to guess the sizes," he said as we pulled away._

"_What are these for?" I asked. He looked over at me and smiled mischievously. _

"_Billy passed initiation," he said. "And now we celebrate."_

"_And I'm the prize?" I asked, not sure whether to be insulted or honored. _

"_He doesn't know," Bodie reassured me. "I was told to pick a girl. And I knew who'd be the perfect one."_

"_We're just friends, Bodie," I argued with him, still unsure about the whole thing. _

"_If that's what ya wanna keep tellin' yourself," he laughed, "but we all know that ain't true."_

_I smiled to myself, glad to hear from someone else that they saw more to me and Billy. I gave up my fight and climbed into the backseat to change._

"_That's the spirit, girl." Bodie laughed, turning his rearview mirror away to give me some privacy._

_He did good guessing he sizes, but the top was still tighter than anything I had worn. pushing my breasts up to where I thought they were going to fall out, making a bra impossible to wear. And the skirt was short, the hem barely making it past my ass, the type of skirt that made your bottom touch the seat when you sat. But it still felt good to feel this hooker-ish hot. _

_I climbed back into the front seat, pulling out my hair and putting on a layer of make up._

"_Good job, Bodie," I told him in regard to the sizes._

"_Billy's gonna love this," he laughed and I tried to hide my smile to no prevail. _

_We stopped a few minutes later, pulling into one of the seedy motels that dotted our town. Bodie ushered me to a room, opening it for me._

"_He'll be coming in just a sec," Bodie told me, taking the key with him. _

_After Bodie left, I peeked through the curtains and watched him stand at his car until another pulled up. Billy's car. Bodie handed him the key and pointed to the room I was in. I could feel my heart pounding out of my chest. Billy fought it for a second, trying not to accept the key. Bodie leaned down and said something I couldn't make out. Then Billy finally accepted the key with what could only be described as reluctance. _

_I backed out of the window as he headed toward the room. Since it was close to three or four in the morning, the entire place was dark, so I just sat on the edge of the bed, not turning on any lights. Finally, I heard the key in the door and then Billy came in._

"_Hello?" he called into the darkness of the room, closing the door behind him. Rather than saying anything, I just walked over and kissed him, pressing my body to his and wrapping my arms around his neck._

_He pulled away after a moment. "Hansen?" he asked, total shock in his voice. I walked past him to the light switch, turning on the lamp in the corner. He stared at me for a second, his eyes scanning over the outfit, still with a bewildered look on his face. _

"_I didn't plan this," I told him, walking closer to him. "I didn't even know about it until Bodie picked me up."_

_His expression never changed, just kept that somewhat confused, somewhat amused look across his brow. I took it all as a bad sign, insecurity being my default setting. _

"_But this isn't what you wanted?" I guessed, backing away a little. _

_He smiled then, coming over and kissing me again. He placed his hands right below the hem of the skirt and lifted me up. I laughed and wrapped my legs around him._

_He walked us over to the bed, laying me down, him leaning over me, kissing me more. He moved his hands from my legs to the bottom of my shirt, pausing before pushing it up._

"_What's the matter?" I asked, looking up at him. My whole body was shaking, both nervous and excited. _

"_You sure 'bout this?" he asked. He was breathing heavily, a little nervous himself. I pulled myself to him, kissing him again. _

"_Most definitely," I said with a smile, laying back on the bed._

_He didn't ask again, just pulled off my shirt, kissing my neck, leaving a trail of feather-light kisses down through the space between my breasts, making a path down my stomach, pushing up my skirt. He stopped before going any further._

_"I'm a first timer Darley," I joked with him. "Be gentle with me." _

_I looked down in time to see him smile before hooking two thumbs on the straps of my underwear and pulling them down._

_I woke up few hours later, light peeking through the gap the curtains. Billy was next to me, and arm wrapped tightly around me. I smiled to myself, turning over to face him._

_He moaned a little, waking up but not opening his eyes. "Go back to sleep, babe," he whispered. _

_"I need to ask you something," I said quietly. His eyes drifted open, looking at me through sleep-ridden lids. _

_"Hmm?" he asked, raising his eyebrows at me._

_"Is this all that's going to happen?" I asked him, nervously casting my eyes down. I was such a chicken, I couldn't even look him in the face while asking him how he felt. "I mean, is this all we're ever going to be? Are we going to leave this hotel room and just always be friends?"_

_I was shaking, nervous again. I took me all night to be able to ask this question, and the answer is what I feared the most. His expression didn't change, he just pulled me closer and kissed me. I didn't smile, I didn't know if I should. A kiss could mean anything._

_"I love you," he told me. My heart ballooned in my chest. "You should know that."_

_"It helps to hear you say it," I told him. I tried to downplay my smile, but it didn't work, I just couldn't help it._

_"Well I do. Always will." He hooked me under my chin, kissing me softly. "Now get some sleep."_

_I nestled myself under his chin, and he tightened his grip around me._

* * *

Many thanks to all my readers!! Wouldn't be able to continue without you! 


	5. Brothers and Dads

**A/N: Ok, so here is Ch. 5. I hope Ch. 6won't take long! Promise to update soon! Reviews of any kind are welcome! Hope you enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't own anything except Hansen. Don't sue. I've already got enough to deal with without a lawsuit!**

* * *

"Hansen," I heard someone calling from somewhere else, somewhere outside my dreamland. "Hansen, wake up," they called again.

My eyes fluttered open, an image of Joe coming into focus above me. I smiled at him.

"Hey, Joey-Boy," I said while yawning. I looked around the bed. No Billy in sight. It wasn't the first or last time that would ever be the case, but I never liked it when I didn't wake up next to him. I sighed to myself, turning my attention back to Joe.

"You have a good time last night?" I asked him, making sure the sheet wrapped around me was still secure before sitting up.

"Yeah," he said with a smile, a glazed look coming over his eyes, remembering his outing. He shook his head, coming back to reality and mumbling, "Oh, good times, good times."

"I don't even want to know," I laughed, hitting him playfully on his arm. Over the years, Joe and I had developed our own closeness. We had become as close as brother and sister, and I loved him as if he were my brother.

"You don't want to know?" he asked sarcastically. "You're not the one who had to listen to you and my brother last night! God, you guys went for hours! You probably lost about 10 pounds from all that."

"Shut up!" I yelled at him, laughing anyways, unable to contain my girlish giggling. "You were so passed out!" I claimed. "You can't tell me we actually woke you up. And I have no reason to have to lose weight!"

"Wouldn't be the first time you've woken me up," he said, getting up off the bed. "And you are starting to look a little plump," he added before leaving the room. I threw a pillow at his retreating back, laughing as he popped his head back in and teasing me for missing. Grabbing my pajamas from earlier last night, I re-clothed and followed him into the kitchen.

"Speaking of your brother," I said, making myself a cup of tea, "Any idea where he disappeared to this morning?"

"Out," he said simply with a shrug, sitting at the small table we had. He downed a shot of Pepto-Bismol and started sipping on a room temperature Pepsi. "Bodie came and got him this morning. Said for you to take the car and meet him at Dad's around 12:30."

"Are you serious?" I asked Joe, hopping up to sit on the counter. None of us liked going over to Bones's place.

"Better you than me," Joe told me, shrugging and taking a bite of some toast. "Don't forget, 12:30."

I rolled my eyes and mimicked a salute. It was just about eleven, now. I walked past Joe, ruffling his hair before heading to the bathroom, but stopped before leaving.

"What?" Joe asked me, giving me a confused look. I grasped a handful of his hair and moved his head to the side. "Ow!" he yelled as I looked at his neck.

"You got a new one?" I asked him, noting the shiny new tattoo of a black and red nautical star on the side of his neck. "Nice. I kinda like it. Who did it?"

"Heco," he mumbled under his breath, already knowing I would disapprove. Heco was a member of the SBE, but a major needle-freak. He loved needles, and loved injecting himself with the heroin/Meth combo that was cooked at The Office. He still had some old tattoo equipment and when drunks at the Four Roses got the brilliant idea for a tattoo, Heco usually supplied it in the back corner of the bar, for a steep price to keep him in his habit.

"What?" I asked, tugging Joe's hair harder, another "Ow!" coming out, but I ignored him, sighing. "Joe! You're not supposed to let smack addicts put tattoos on you in the basement of The Office!"

He shrugged, uncaring, and I rolled my eyes, scoffing at him. This wasn't the first tattoo Heco had put on him. I thought he would learn his lesson when the last one got infected and I had to take him to the free health clinic to get it looked at.

"Don't come crying to me when it's all puffy and infected!" I told him. He flicked me off and I rolled my eyes once more. I left the boy to his breakfast, making my way to the bathroom to get my shower and get ready to go.

----------------------------

I parked outside of the gates of Bone's shop just about 12:15, and stood leaning against the car. The stench of sweat, sulfur, and oil stank up the place, and the glare of welding torches and the screech of power tools came from inside the little crap shack of a chop shop. Large, burley men worked inside, eyeing me lustfully as I stood waiting, dogs on chains barking uncontrollably. But I was used to all this.

I turned away, trying to find anything but them to look at. My eyes settled across the street at the old building, broken now and falling apart from years of neglect. The group home had shut down a year or so ago, all the kids got sent to different facilities. It was cheaper than trying to repair the wooden building which was falling apart when I was there. I started at the old house, expecting to feel something like loss, loss that I didn't have the place I grew up. But instead there was nothing.

I never once thought of the group home as "home". To me it was an "in between" place. I had been going there for years, in between foster homes. But as I got older, I knew my the window of adoption possibility was closing, and when I got too old, I saw it as my temporary residing until I was old enough to leave. Just a house with an empty bunk. I never had a home, not until the apartment.

_A few weeks before I turned 18, I found an envelope on my bed, my name written across it. It was from the staff. I chuckled to myself thinking about how they had resorted to leaving me notes rather than trying to find me._

_The first few months that I kept leaving, I would get reprimanded. Once they even called me in as a runaway. The cops came and picked me up as Billy and I were walking back. But I just kept leaving. After a while they just stopped. I was close to becoming legal and it was more taxing on them then to just let it be. _

_I shrugged at the plain envelope and grabbed it, shoving it in my pocket and grabbing my backpack before heading out to the awaiting car. _

_"Hi," I greeted, leaning over to kiss him, throwing my backpack in the backseat. He kissed me back and then made a U-turn, heading to where ever it was that we had to go today. I sat back, then remembered the letter, pulling it out of my back pocket._

_"Know anyone that's hiring?" I asked Billy after looking over the letter. I roughly shoved it back into the envelope. It was warning me of my 18th birthday. Soon I would have to leave. Past eighteen, the group home would not longer be able to be my residence. _Shit_, I thought to myself. I mean, sure, I wanted to leave there, be out on my own. I knew this was coming, but it always seemed like some far-off date. Now it was thrust into my near future. Two months and I was out. _

I should have been more prepared for this_, I scolded myself silently. But after being in the home since I was fourteen, it always seemed like there was plenty of time. Wrong! And my first thought was that the first step would be to get a job._

_"Whataya talkin' about?" he asked, looking over at me. I held up he envlope._

"_Two months and I turn eighteen, then I'm out," I told him. "And I've got nowhere to go. And no money on top of that, along with no job. I'm so screwed." He remained silent, just focusing on the road. He turned right into a part of town we didn't visit too often, usually just around the holidays. You'd be surprised what people thought made the perfect Christmas present._

"_New clients?" I asked, wondering why were over here. He didn't say anything, just shook his head. We traveled in silence for a little while longer, the only noise coming from the CD player, The Black Angels singing out a dreary ballad. The area we drove into wasn't too bad, not high-scale or anything like that, but then again there weren't any dealers on the corner and the hookers were nowhere to be found._

_Finally, Billy pulled up outside of one of the buildings. It wasn't much, a five story walk-up that needed a new layer of paint, some small cracks in the worn brick, but it had some character to it. Someone had loved it, but that was apparently long ago._

"_What are we doing here?" I asked Billy. He didn't say a word, as usual, just offered a hand that I accepted. He led me inside. He didn't have his bag, meaning this wasn't a deal, as he had told me before. My confusion continued as we climbed the stairs, all the way to the top. _

_He let go of my hand and pulled out a key with a small tag attached to the keychain. I furrowed my brow, watching as Billy unlocked the door, ushering me in. _

_As I stood in what would be the living room, had the place had any occupants, my confusion still hadn't subsided. This place was empty. No furniture, new carpet. The smell of fresh paint was still present. You could tell it was just about as old as the building, the linoleum in the kitchen starting to peel and bubbled in some places. Some appliances needed to be replaced, years of abuse starting to take its charge. But, all in all, a nice place._

"_What's this?" I asked, still confused._

"_An apartment," he told me with a shrug. "Granted, a cheap one, has a lot of work that still needs to be done. But it's not the group home and it's not Bones's place."_

"_You and me?" I asked, still not believing what I was hearing. "Our own place, together?"_

_He nodded, watching my expression closely. A smile slowly spread across my face as I realized what he was suggesting, not stopping until it ran from ear to ear. I ran over to him and jumped into his arm. He caught me, wrapping his arms around me._

"_It's not much," he said simply as he put me back down. "But it'll be ours."_

"_Are you kidding?" I asked him incredulously. "It's fucking perfect!"_

_He smirked at me, kissing my temple. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled myself up to kiss him. _

"_I love you," I told him seriously and he kissed me again, letting his lips linger on mine for more than necessary. _

"_I know a few people I can get cheap furniture from," he told me as I left his grasp to take a deeper look into my soon-to-be home. "I figured you'd wanna dress it up yourself."_

_I left his arms, wandering around, plans of what to fill it with coming into mind. I had never had my own room, let alone my own place. But there was one thing I knew I had to fill it with, above all: pictures. That was the one thing that would make it truly home, lots and lots of pictures. _

"_Two bedrooms?" I asked curiously as I moved down the hall, finding two empty rooms. I looked back at him. He nodded. _

"_Actually that was something I wanted to talk to you about," he told me, walking over to where I was. "Joe is gonna come stay with us, too. I can't leave him with Bones by himself."_

_He presented it to me as if it wasn't an option, but that was his way. Billy never asked, he told you what the deal was. It was how he ran his corner, how he ran his crew, how he ran his life. But I knew better than to take offense to it, when it came to those that were close to him that was his way of asking. I rarely said no to him, he never gave me a reason to. With Billy, I had come to discover you could never go just by what he said, you just had to know to read him right. _

_And I have no doubts whatsoever that I just discovered how to read Billy on my own. If he didn't want me to know, if he hadn't let me in, I would never know which end was up with him. He saw something in me long ago when we first met, and from there he deemed me worthy of knowing him. I don't know, maybe the something good he saw in me was the hope that I saw something good in him, as well._

"_Have you told Joe?" I asked, wrapping my arms around his neck again. He nodded, his lips tightening into a small smile, his arms coming around my waist. _

"_He's eager to leave the shop, to have his own room."_

"_And he's okay with all of us living here? Together?" I asked, finding myself to be nervous while waiting for the answer. Joe and I got along great, but Billy and he had a very close-knit brotherhood, I didn't want to intrude._

"_Of course," he told me, his brow scrunching into curiosity and confusion. "You belong here. You're family."_

_I swear, in that moment, I thought I was going to explode from happiness. I felt it in me as he said it: I belonged somewhere. I had family, finally. Last names, blood, and screwed up childhoods didn't matter. This was all I needed, they were all I needed._

I tore my eyes away from the old building, coming back to reality, watching as a car pulled up next to the one I was leaning against. It was almost identical, the only differences being the flip-flop of the color. Where Billy's was black with deep red markings starting on the hood and trailing down the sides, this one was red with black designs mirroring the one's of it's twin. Bodie's car.

Billy exited from the passenger side and Bodie drove off, leaving us. I smiled at him, and he nodded back. He came over and kissed my temple then leaned into the car and grabbed a bag off of the back floorboard. He threw it onto his shoulder and looked over at me.

"What's with look?" he asked. I narrowed my eyes at him, looking at him through slanted lids.

"So where'd you go this morning?" I asked, faking annoyance. I couldn't help it: I loved giving him a hard time. Especially when he left without telling me.

He shrugged. "I had things to do," he told me simply. "Bodie came and picked me up."

"And you couldn't wake me up to say bye?" I asked, not letting it go with just his simple answer. He looked at me, getting annoyed, then saw through my façade. I let out a small laugh as he shook his head.

"Don't start, silly girl," he said, letting out a small laugh, barely audible, but I knew it was there. He stood in front of me and placed one hand on my hip. I looked up at him and he kissed me quickly.

"Come on," he said, his hands falling off of me. "Let's go do this."

I hid my disappointment and nodded, following him as we made our ways into the gates of the shop. We walked past the men, all of them looking up, but not making a sound. Though Bones's shop was not a place where Billy showed me much affection, they knew not to try anything. There were not cat calls or howling whistles, they just kept to their work, barely glancing up as we passed by.

We kept walking through the maze of the shop until we reached the back room, where Bones's office was. I can't say much about Bones Darley, and not a bit of it is good. He was a tall, overweight man, with black, thick frame glasses that were tapped in the middle after years of abuse. A deep, throaty voice with a heavy Boston accent, he gave off an intimidating presence that Billy had duplicated.

My encounters with the boys' father were always very short, and spaced far in between, and that I can say I am glad about. I didn't like him, plain and simple. Above all, I hated the way he treated his boys: Insults were his "fatherly advice" and a good smack on the back of the head was his way of caring, if that's what you wanted to call it.

As we crossed the doorway into the office, I stopped a few feet in as Billy walked in front of the desk. In this room, in his father's presence, this was a different Billy. Every time he stepped through that threshold, it was as if he shed a skin. He was a different person now, a lot more harder around the edges then before. An aura made of shiny steel he hoped would be impenetrable. But just like every other moment in his life, he father knew just had to tear him down.

"What the fuck is this shit?" Bones shot at Billy, looking at the amount of money he had pulled from the bag. It was a great amount of money, though average compared to what I had seen them rake in before, but Bones always had a problem. Being pleased wasn't apart of him.

Billy just stood there, not offering him an answer as Bones counted it. Finally, he pulled out a metal box from a desk drawer and placed it in there nicely. He silently put the box back into the drawer before reaching for a gun sitting on the table. My breath caught in my throat, as I watched him hold the gun casually. He pointed it at Billy, and though I knew he would never shoot him, I still could feel myself start to shake.

"I told you that you better start fuckin' deliverin' me good shit," he warned calmly. Then he pulled the trigger, the faint click being heard throughout the office. Billy flinched a little, and Bones let out a disgusted sigh.

"Fuckin' pussy," he said as he put the gun back on the table. "Now, get the fuck outta my sight." He dismissed us with a distracted wave of his hand, looking back down at the gun in front of him, taking it apart to clean it, getting it ready to be sold.

Billy roughly grabbed the empty bag from the desk and moved quickly toward the door.

"And take your bitch witchya!" he called to Billy's back. I glared at him for a second, but followed Billy silently. This was not my place, nor my fight. I'd pay more hell if I fought back.

We rode in silence back to our apartment. I stared out of the window the entire way while Billy drove like a madmen through the streets. We never turned on the radio, just sat silently. He finally came to a stop in front of our building.

I opened my door, then turned back to look at him. He sat back in his seat, eyes gazing forward, his breathing calm and steady, but the anger flared in his eyes.

"Not coming in?" I asked quietly. He shook his head.

"Got shit ta do," he said dimly, giving me a slight shrug. I nodded sadly. My heartbeat sped up and I was nervous. I was always nervous when he fell into this closed-off disposition. Sometimes he'd be like this for days, not letting anyone in at all. More than once I thought I would lose him . Then I wouldn't know what to do. I never really thought about my future, but I could never imagine it without him.

I sighed quietly to myself, then went to exit the car. He grabbed me around my wrist and I turned back to look at him.

"I'll be back tonight," he told me, looking at me for the first time since we left the shop. I smiled.

"I have to work tonight," I told him regretfully. He nodded.

"I'll be there tonight," he said quietly.

"Coming to baby-sit me, Darley?" I asked playfully.

"Have to make sure you don't go causin' trouble," he said, mocking seriousness. I smiled lightly.

"Me?" I asked, sarcastically, coming back into the car to get closer to him. "Never."

He gave me a suspicious look, and I leaned forward and kissed him, lingering for a moment before pulling back.

"I'll see you tonight," he told me again. I nodded, and then got all the way out of the car this time.

After closing the door, I leaned forward into the open window.

"I love you," I told him. He flashed a smile at me

"Love you, too."

Then he was gone.

* * *

**Hope you enjoyed! Chapter 6 coming ASAP! Again, reviews of any kind are welcome, but if you're going to flame, try and be a little nice about it!**

**samantha hedlund08: Thank you for the review. I have to admit, I too was disappointed at the lack of DS fics! And the one I liked hasn't been updated since September! **

**xNegAttentionx: hope you like this chapter! I cannot wait to read more of Running Out of Love!!**

**Iris Knotwise: I would love to be taught guns by Billy, too! So hott!! Thanks for the review!!**


	6. What Do You Want From Me

**I know, I'm a total wench for taking almost a month to update!! Writer's Block is such a bitch!! **

**So, here, new chapter!! (I know, finally) and I've finally discovered what I'm doing!! Anyways, hope you like. It's a tad different than my last chapters... Hope you like! **

**Disclaimer: I don't own it. You already know it. Get over it. **

* * *

"Hey, Sammy!" I called to the bartender, leaning far over the bar. "I need three bottles, Guinness!" 

He nodded in agreement, and I turned around to find someone less than an inch behind me. He scared me for a moment, before I realized this it was a friendly face standing before me.

"Hey, Mikey," I said cheerfully. Mikey was a good friend of Joe's, and a runner for the SBE. He grew up in this area, a little north of the group home and Bones's shop. He was kinda small for his age, to the point that I was surprised when I learned of his package-running status. Intimidation was not the aura that surrounded Mikey. His physical appearance shouted more of "prey" than "predator". But Joe vouched for him, which Billy automatically had accepted.

"How you doing tonight?" I asked him as I picked up my tray with the three beers that Sammy had given me. "Can I get ya a beer?"

"Nah," he said with a small shake of his head. Mikey was a strange kid regularly, but tonight, he seemed a bit more jumpy than usual. He kept his head pointed to the ground, but his eyes were constantly eyeing everything around him. He wouldn't look at me for more than half a second before looking away, at someone else.

"You okay, Mikey?" I asked suspiciously. "You seem a little tweaked."

"You seen Billy?" he asked, rather than answering my question.

"No," I told him truthfully. Billy hadn't showed up yet. "You want me to let him know you were looking for him?"

"Yeah," he said with a quick nod. "Just tell him I gotta talk to him."

"No problem, Mikey," I said quickly as I walked over to my table to serve the beers.

About an hour later, I nodded to Sammy that I was taking my break outside. I fought my way through the maze of sweaty bodies and loud drunks and out the back door, my whole body relaxing in the comfort of the quiet. I leaned against the brick wall, concealing myself behind a stack of boxes, taking a deep drag on a cigarette.

Suddenly, my relaxation was interrupted as I heard the back door open and a familiar voice called my name.

"Hansen?" they called. "You out here, babe?"

Billy had his back turned to wear I was, so I took the opportunity to walk over and jump on his back, careful not to burn him with my cigarette.

"Hey you," he said with a laugh as I kissed his cheek and let go of him. He turned to face me and I smiled as I took in the sight of him: the tall size, tight black shirt that outlined his muscles, the silver cross that hung from his neck, the brown leather coat that hung to his knees. And his smell: cigars and that same no-name cologne.

"Billy," I said lovingly, reaching up and hugging him. He wrapped an arm around my waist and kissed me quickly.

His eyes were glazed, a sleepy quality fixed inside of them. A hint of tequila was present on his breath, as expected after a meeting with Bones. Always just drink and smoke away the pain of his father. It was more than just cigars tonight. But what did I care? It all just made him sweeter, a trait he surely didn't get from Bones.

"What are you doin' out here by yourself?" he asked, not letting his hand leave my waist. I scoffed and rolled my eyes.

"Don't start," I told him playfully. "I'm fully capable of having a cigarette outside by myself, _without_ a babysitter. I just wanted to get away from the noise for a few minutes."

"Well, you're done with it now," he told me, taking it from my hand and throwing it towards the back of the alley. "So come on back inside."

I narrowed my eyes at him, but allowed him to push me back inside, has hand moving to the small of my back.

"Oh, before I forget," I said, turning to face him again. "Mikey was looking for you earlier. Said he's gotta talk to ya. Told him I'd pass the message along."

He nodded and without another word, we reentered the bar and I went back to work.

The night wore on slowly, getting busier as it got a little later. I was delivering a tray full of Jack Daniels shots and beer chasers to a table when I looked up to see Billy sitting at a small table with Bodie and Mikey standing in front of them. This only struck me as odd because Billy and the rest usually sat at the table closest to the bar, and it was usually all of the guys, not just him and Bodie. But I assumed a need for more privacy when I could see the look on Billy's face. He was pissed.

"Pissed" actually wasn't a good way to describe it. I knew his annoyed/pissed off expression, which usually was comprised of a smirk and a tired look in his eyes. This was anger, though. The frown, the hard eyes, but an ultimately blank expression, just kept it all simmering right below the surface.

I went closer to one of the back tables and began to clear it. Neither Bodie or Billy looked up at me. I caught a glimpse of Mikey and he looked freaked. Bodie caught my eye and I raised my eyebrows at him. He just raised his back quickly, then turned back to the conversation.

I continued on with the rest of the night. Mikey left quietly later, slipping silently out of the backdoor. People filtered out slowly as it got closer towards closing time. Bodie left as we were locking up, but Billy stayed in the back, waiting for me.

I cleaned the tables, then split my tips with the busboys and the bartender. I announced my departure to Sammy and made my way to the back table where Billy was still sitting.

"Hey," I said, sitting in the chair across from him. He looked up at me, lifting his eyebrows at me quickly, but I could see he was still lost in thought.

"Penny for your thoughts?" I asked, placing a dollar bill on the table. He smiled for a split second, then slid my dollar back to me.

"I think you're overpaying," he said quietly.

I smiled at him. "You ready to get outta here?" I asked and he nodded. He came to walk next to me, throwing an arm around my shoulder as I gripped his waist. We waved goodbye to the workers that were still there and then made our way the six blocks back home.

------------------------------------------------

I walked up the stoop and towards the door, looking in my purse for my keys when I heard someone behind me. I paid no attention to them as I continued the search in my purse until I heard my name

"Ms. Matthews?" she asked. A black women with medium length hair reaching a little past her shoulder. She was dressed nicely, business nicely: cream-colored pants and jacket with a white shirt underneath. She didn't look as if she belonged on this side of the neighborhood.

"Can I help you with something?" I asked suspiciously. She didn't look like a jolly-popper. Then again, if she wanted drugs, customers knew not to come to me for it.

"My name is Detective Jessica Wallis," she said, reaching into her pocket, showing me her credentials. "I'm investigating the death of a Michael Nuryan."

"Mikey?" I asked her, a little shock seeping into my voice. _Mikey's dead? I just saw him two nights ago, _I thought to myself. But I didn't dare utter it out loud. Let them ask the questions before you answered any.

"Yes," she told me unemotionally. "His body was found in an abandoned warehouse not far from here." Deserted warehouses dotted this area, so that didn't really narrow the field, nor did it kill any of my curiosity.

"So you knew him?" she asked, bringing me back to the conversation. I looked back up at her, realizing that I had been staring at the ground. I composed myself a little, trying to remain as unemotional as her. To not let anything through.

"In passing," I told her, suddenly nervous, my pose unfaltering. Why would she be talking to me? "He comes... Came to the bar where I work a lot."

"Sources say he was also a good friend of Joe Darley's. Is that true?" she asked, pulling out a small pad of paper and a pen. Now came the part to act dumb. I didn't have much experience when talking to cops, but enough to know not to say too much. Knowledge like that just kind of came with the territory of being with Billy and associated with the SBE.

"I wouldn't know," I told her with a shrug. "I don't keep track of Joey's friends."

"But you do live with him, right? Him and his older brother Billy?"

"Yeah," I told her shortly.

"And you're also currently seeing Billy Darley. Socially. Correct?" I started at her for a moment, confusion sweeping over my facial expression. Why was she asking about Billy? I thought this was about Mikey?

"What other way would there be for me to see Billy? And what does that have to do with anything?" I asked. A new emotion was flooding over me: Worry. Worry, confusion, anger.

"And how long have you been living with him and his brother Joe?"

"About a year and a half. Since I turned eighteen. You didn't answer my question," I reminded her.

"Did you know that Billy is on prime suspects list for four separate murders?" she asked suddenly.

Four murders?! My brain couldn't get past that enough to answer the questions. My gaze had fell again to the floor, and when I looked back up at the detective, I tried my best to keep my composure.

"I thought this was about Mikey?" I asked, trying like hell to keep my voice level, trying to keep the surprise of her statement to myself.

"We know Michael was a part of Billy's crew," she told me calmly. "I'm just trying to find out what happened to this kid."

I sighed. Feigning good intentions, I fought the urge to roll my eyes. "Last I saw him, he was at the bar. Beyond that, I couldn't tell you what he's been up to."

"And when was the last time that he was up at the bar?" She asked the question, but she already knew the answer. No point in lying.

"Two days ago," I told her.

"And did you speak with him that night?"

"Nothing more than the usual 'hello's and 'how are you's." My patience was wearing thin with this woman. With my emotions all askew, a single thought was clouding my brain: I had to talk to Billy. And fast.

"Did he seem different to you at all? Anything out of the ordinary?"

I shook my head. "Looked fine to me."

"And did he ask to speak with Billy Darley?" Jesus, was she there or something? Someone must have had a big mouth.

"People don't need my permission to speak with Billy," I said, my unpleasantness seeping into my voice.

"Did you see them talking at all that night?" This was why I hated cops, they were just downright nosey.

"It was a busy night," I told her. "I didn't have time to sit and have a full conversation with him and I didn't see him the rest of the night."

"Okay," she said finally, after staring me down for a good minute. She handed me a card. "Well, if you remember anything else, give me a call."

I nodded and watched her as she walked back to her car. I waited until she was fully inside before I went inside, bounding up the stairs, taking them two at a time. I came flying into the apartment, roughly throwing my purse onto the couch and searching for Joe.

I found him in his room, putting on his red leather biking jacket, Billy's nova keys in his hand.

"Hey," he said casually, then, after looking me up and down, he added, "you look pissed."

"Where in the _fuck_ is your brother?" I asked him as calmly as I could, which wasn't very calm at all.

"This is really not a good idea," Joe said. Again.

We were on our way to The Office. In Billy's car. Joe was on his way to pick him up when I cornered him in the apartment, forcing him to take me with him. I was not about to wait around for Billy to get home at four in the morning when I was asleep and I'd lose my train of thought if I waited until the morning. Plus, I thought he might be interested to learn about Mikey. If he didn't already know.

"I don't care," I told Joe for the umpteenth time. I was being fueled by anger. There was no way his silly rules were stopping me. And he wasn't answering his phone, adding to my not-so-great mood.

We pulled around the back of the large four story building that had once served as a mental institute. It had closed down a couple of decades ago due to lack of clientele. Lack of interest has left it abandoned. Now it served as a lab, where everything was cooked.

Cars stayed in back as not to attract attention and most of the original fence to keep out trespassers was still intact, serving the same purpose. Only a select few knew of this place, only people Billy trusted enough to tell.

Joe led me to a door on the side of the building that was marked as a fire exit. I followed him up one flight of stairs to an large open room. The whole room was filled with supplies. Tables covered in scales and already packaged heroin. Things hung from the sealing, cooking more stuff. Hot plates sat with pots cooking on top. A strange smell floated around the room and I fought the urge to crinkle my nose at it.

Bodie was sitting on top of one to the table and when he saw Joe and I standing there, a betrayed expression was stuck on his face, his hands up in exasperation.

"Where's Billy?" I asked him before he could say anything.

"Joe?" Bodie asked, ignoring me. Joe just shrugged.

"She didn't leave me much of a choice," he told Bodie. Bodie walked over towards me, giving Joe a good smack on the back of the head in the process.

"Now, Hansen, you know you're not supposed to be here," he said quietly.

"Christ Bodie, you think I don't know that?" I asked, my frustration boiling over. Especially now that I was being treated like a toddler. "D'ya think I'd be here if it wasn't fucking important? I gotta talk to Billy and he's not answering his phone."

He heaved a sigh and walked past me, signaling for me to follow. He led back to the stairwell and we climbed up two more floors to the fourth floor. He walked over to a set of double doors, a sign to the side marked this room as the chapel.

"So what's this about?" he asked, turning to face me before venturing beyond the doors.

"Mikey," I told him. "He's dead."

"That all?" he asked, not seeming to be surprised of the sudden demise of Mikey.

"Like I said, I wouldn't be here if it wasn't important," I told him sternly. "I know I'm not supposed to ever come here in the first place." Jeez, more fucking rules.

"He's just trying to make sure you don't get hurt. Take as a compliment that he cares enough to protect you," Bodie told me, trying to comfort me. But I wasn't in the mood.

"Please, Bodie, I don't wanna hear it!" I almost yelled, completely exasperated.

He nodded, giving up, then went through the doors, taking caution not to open them anymore than enough to let him through. I stood outside, chewing on my bottom lip. A few moments later, Billy walked out, closing the door behind him.

"What the hell are ya doin' here, Hansen?" he asked strictly. He made no move to kiss me or greet me in any way. He just stood there, back straight, arms crossed over his chest, eyes staring straight into mine. The very look of intimidation. His eyes radiating anger, just as pissed off as I was at that moment. But I wasn't about to be intimidated.

"Mikey's dead," I told him, my arms crossed over my chest, pushing my weight onto one of my legs. "And today a _Detective Wallace_ sought me out on the steps of _our_ apartment building to question me about it."

His eyes flickered recognition at the sound of the detective's name, but he made no move to explain. He just waited for me to continue. I told him everything about the detective had told me and all my answers, but left out the part where she told me of the four other murder investigations. He didn't say a word, only nodding at the appropriate times.

"So?" I asked when I was finished. He didn't say anything, just continued to stare at me. "Mind telling me what the fuck is going on?"

"I dunno, Hansen," he said. I looked at him, my mouth hanging open in disbelief. "What the fuck do you want me to say?!"

"How about you stop treating me like I'm five and ell me what Mikey was so tweaked about the other night?" I yelled. "How about telling me about the other four murder investigations that you're on the suspect list for?"

He didn't say anything. Just looked away toward some off-in-the-distance object.

"Yeah, she mentioned that," I said, feeling tears well up in my eyes, tears most definitely from anger. "Would you, just for once, tell me what the hell is going on?"

He nodded his head, finally looking back at me, but not an ounce of anger had left his eyes.

"You wanna know?" he asked. I nodded. "Fine."

He grabbed me by my arm and dragged me into the chapel. Inside was Bodie, Jamie, and Heco. There was another person in there, only he was tied to a chair, screaming about not knowing anything. I looked at Billy, but he just looked at Bodie.

"What the hell?" he asked Billy, referring to me being there.

"No, Bodie," he said, leaving no room for argument. "She wants to know."

Billy put out his hand, and a defeated Bodie handed him a gun. Before I could even find my voice to ask what was happening, or to yell in objection, Billy pointed it straight at the man in the chair and then pulled the trigger.

My mouth fell open and a slight sound came out, something in between a scream or a cry of protest, I wasn't sure. Billy turned around, coming close to my face, pulling me closer by my upper arm. I could feel my bottom lip beginning to tremble as I met his eyes.

"Is that what you wanted to see, Hansen?!" he yelled, pointing with his gun back to the lifeless body in the chair. A thick stench of blood and sulfur filled the room. My stomach was getting ready to revolt and my eyes were threatening to spill with tears.

I shook my head hard, telling him no and trying to shake the images out of my head simultaneously. He sighed and let go of my arm, not returning my gaze as my eyes fell on him again.

"Bodie," he said, turning to face him. "Take her home."

He let go of my arm and I opened my mouth, then closed it immediately, knowing I didn't have a clue as to what to say. Instead, I just followed Bodie out the door.

As we got close to the stairwell, I turned around and ran back to the chapel. I went through the doors, closing them behind me. Billy was in the room, alone. Jamie and Heco had taken the body, and I didn't want to know what they were going to do.

His back was to me, leaning forward on one of the crumbling pews.

"Are you coming home later?" I asked quietly. He nodded, not turning to face me. I walked over to him, placing a hand on his shoulder. He turned his head to look at me. I offered him a small flash of a smile and he wrapped an arm around me, pulling me closer.

He kissed my hair and then whispered, "I'll be home later."

I nodded and then left.

* * *

**So, what d'ya think?? Please R&R! I'm working on the next chapter, I promise! I hope it comes out faster than this one, I'll try my best!!**

** Thank yous to:**

**XxBrokenEighthNotesxX : new reviewer!! I'm so excited!!**

**Iris Knotwise : I know! They're both so hott! Where do I sign up?????**

**ashes101 : I know! more people need to write DS-fics! But, then again, I don't know if I could handle the competition... lol :)**

**XNegAttentionX : sorry it took so long!! and, again, I cannot wait to read more of Jack and Belle!!!!!!! So excited!!**

**Maxiekat : thank you so much for the kind words! I can't wait to read your fics, I just haven't done it yet, trying to force myself to write a little, haha.**

**And thank you to all my other readers!! **

**Oh, PS: umm, if anyone has a certain picture or specific description that they see physically for Hansen, I was just wondering if you could let me know what it was. I know I haven't really described her, so I was just wondering what everyone thinks... So, thank you for anything and everything!! **


	7. Not Going Anywhere

**A/N: I know, I'm a totally wretched human being for taking so long to update and I'm sooooo sorry. I had it written, but what I had was totally out-of-character for both of them and I just had to keep trying to fix it. I promise I will try extremely hard to get the next one out ASAP.**

**So, I hope my rewrite was good! (Not that you know what the other looked like, but trust me, this is the better one:) )**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Death Sentence or any of its characters. If I did, I'd be rich, and I wouldn't be pulling 50 hours a week at Sonny's Real Pit BBQ, and then I wouldn't have to write the little bits and pieces of my fic on little sections of receipt paper between rushes.**

* * *

I heard the loud engine of his car from the street and my back went rigid. Sue me, I was nervous. The images from earlier still flooded my brain and no matter how much air freshener I sprayed, all I could smell was blood and gunpowder. I was scared of where the conversation that lay before us was going to go, but I would never be scared _of him_. It was impossible: I loved him far too much.

I leaned against the doorframe leading to the kitchen, watching as he came through the front door. His eyes caught mine. 1, 2, 3 seconds, he held my gaze and for the first time in a long time, I couldn't see past his eyes. He had completely cut me out. He pulled his eyes away from mine and immediately my eyes stung as they flooded with tears. He was like sand: sliding between my fingers at a dangerously fast rate and I was powerless to stop it.

He shed his leather coat, carelessly throwing it over some random chair rather than with the gentle precision he usually took when retiring the coat for the time being. He had his back to me, running a hand over his clean shaven scalp, letting out a heavy sigh. I cautiously walked over to him, slowly reaching out a wary hand and placing it on his shoulder. He tensed at my touch but made no move to shove me away. Taking this as a good sign, I wrapped both of my arms around him, pulling myself so close there was no more space between us, my body hugging on to his, kissing his shoulder.

"Stop," he said suddenly, pulling violently away from me. I was taken aback for a moment, my hands still hanging in midair where he had pushed them. I took a step back after a second, wrapping my arms around myself, trying to make myself smaller. I met his gaze for a split second, this time me pulling my eyes away from his quickly. He saw the tears roll down my face as I tried my best to wipe them away before they got too out of control.

"I don't know what you want from me, Hansen," he said, his tone sounding like someone who was at the end of their rope, fed up by everything. "I try to keep you safe, protect you, but you just keep fuckin' pushing." He turned and looked at me and his facial expression matching his tone and the only thing that I could think to do was stare back at him.

"I didn't want you to see that today," he continued. "Ever. But you asked for it. So now, I don't know what you want me to do. I don't even know why you're still fuckin' here."

"You don't know why I'm here?" I asked him, all my fear being replaced swiftly by mounds of anger. "I'm _here_ because I love you, jackass!" He just continued to stare at me, no emotion evident on his features, just nothing. His lack of a reaction only making me want to slap him dead across the face.

"I don't want to be some porcelain doll to you, and I'm not saying I want to be the guy who pulls the trigger either, but I would like to know what the fuck is going on!" I yelled, standing straight, arms crossed over my chest. "I'm not asking for full disclosure, but being blindsided by Detective Wallis wasn't such a great go either."

I finished my ramblings and if I didn't see the steady pace of his chest rising, I would have thought I was talking to a mannequin. It was unnerving to see him so impassive towards my outrage. This is how he treated other people, people who pissed him off, people he didn't like at all. It was like his eyes weren't glaring at me, but gazing straight through me, as if I wasn't even there.

And then, just as rapidly as my anger had risen in me, I was taken by fear again. What if this was it? What if we ended right here, right now? I could barley imagine the next five minutes being angry with him, but him not being in my future was unfathomable to me. And not just because I needed him, though I very much did, but because I wanted him, loved him more than anything. This couldn't be it. I had to make him see me again.

I walked over to him quickly, standing in front of him. His eyes quickly left mine. "Please, " I pleaded. "Please just look at me!" And he did. His eyes were made of steel, but he was looking at me, seeing me, and that gave me hope again.

"No matter what you do," I told him, choosing words carefully, anger and fear along with a trace of confidence coming out in my tone, "I'm not going anywhere. And it's because I love you. Whole fucking heartedly. I love you, and Joey, and everything about my life. So would you please trust me?"

I begged him with my eyes that were now filling with tears, no matter how much I wanted them to stay dry. Tears just always seemed so petty to me, as if you're trying to play on someone's sympathy. But, either way, I knew Billy didn't have sympathy when he didn't want to. So all I could do was hope, hope that I had gotten through.

And suddenly, he moved. To the couch. He collapsed onto it with a heavy sigh. I looked at the ground, trying not to let myself think that I had just failed. After he didn't say anything, I finally looked over at him. He looked up at me and motioned for me to come over to him.

I walked over, sitting across from him on the coffee table, arms still folded across my chest.

"I don't need your protection, Hansen," he told me, fighting hard to remain calm. I sat there silently, waiting for him to continue. "If you're asking for me to tell you everything so can try and protect me from the cops, I don't need you to do that. If they had anything on me, they wouldn't have come to you."

"I don't care if you need my protection or not," I said, sounding like the stubborn 19-year-old that I was, "I'll help you anyway I can."

"And this is why I keep you out of it."

I leaned forward, not stopping in my argument. "I watched you go to jail once, Billy, and that nearly killed me. I _will not_ watch you go away again. I _can't_ do it again. And that was for only six months. If you go away for murder, I'm without you for years."

He was silent, and as I waited, I remembered four months after I moved in.

_I was just arriving at the Four Roses, cleaning the tables, readying for the customers that night. It was a Friday, good tip night. I had gotten the job at the bar a few days after I had left the group home and moved into the apartment with Billy and Joe. We had come in one afternoon, and I was pretty familiar with the place, having come here with Billy more than a few times, and there in the window was a HELP WANTED sign. And I had been working there ever since, keeping up with my end of the bills, no matter how much Billy told me I didn't need to worry about it._

_As I went behind the bar, checking the coolers to make sure they were stalked and getting ready to level the bottles of liquor, Joe came busting through the door._

_"Hansen!" he called, running over to me. "Billy just got busted over on W 2nd St."_

_"What?!" I yelled, slamming my hands, palms flat down, on the counter._

_"Go with Joe," I heard from next to me, and I turned my head to see Sammy, my boss and good friend of Billy's, standing there listening to Joe. I thanked him quickly and grabbed my stuff and left with Joe over to Nashua Street where the Suffolk County Jail was located._

_He had been sentenced to six months for Possession of a Class A substance in the Nashua Street Jail. Three times a week I would go up there to visit him from 1pm to 3pm. Joe went up the day I didn't._

_I spent six months not being able to touch him, our only contact being through a thick plate of glass and a phone receiver, sitting for two hours on uncomfortable metal stools. I could still see him in the dark blue uniform of the inmates in the Suffolk County Jail. _

_Six months from hell. Six months of sleeping by myself. Six months of not being able to touch him or kiss him. Six months of only being allowed to see him only three times a week in two-hour intervals. Six months he swore I would never have to go through again. _

Finally, he leaned forward, sighing once again, and I pushed away the images of Nashua Street Jail and blue uniforms out of my mind, best I could. Instead, I focused on him, here in front of me, in dark jeans and a nice black t-shirt.

He placed his hands on the outsides of my thighs, pulling me to him until I was straddling him, and he sat back into the couch, pulling me close.

"That was almost eight months ago," he told me calmly, seriously. "And I swore to you that I would never do that again."

"And I'm telling you," I said, just as seriously, "that I will do anything in my power to make sure you keep that promise."

He gave a short nod. "There are some things that I do that aren't very formidable," he stated. "Things I never wanted you to see."

"I believe that what you do what you feel is necessary, whether it's pretty or not," I replied. "And I trust your reasons behind it, whether I know them or not. But I still want to know what the hell is going on around here. And don't I'm gonna run away from you. No matter what, I'll always be here at the end of the day, as long as you let me be."

He brought his hand gently to my face, moving some hair that had fallen in front of my eyes.

"Where did I find such a silly girl?" he asked quietly, almost as if only to himself.

"The orphanage," I answered anyway. He nodded, a small smirk coming through.

"I'll tell you what you need to know," he told me. I smiled, throwing my arms around his neck and hugged him to me tightly ad his arms wrapped around my back. A deep breath that I didn't know I was holding came out as relief flooded through me, knowing that this argument was over, that we were still good.

He kissed my hair and I leaned back just enough to give him access to my mouth. As the kiss deepened, I pressed my upper body against his as his grip round me became stronger. After a few minutes, he stood up, never breaking our stronghold on each other's mouths, and he walked us into the bedroom.

It was very early morning when I woke up. Still dark, but you could see the new day peeking around the edges of the sky. I turned over and looked at Billy's sleeping form. I took a finger and very lightly traced the swirling patterns of his tattoos that ran along his arm and around his neck. When I came to the end of the swirl on his neck, my finger moved to the large scar on his face. I thick line that paralleled with his jaw line. A souvenir from his six-month stay on Nashua Street.

A rival gang member had caught him with a sharpened toothbrush. And though he now laid six feet underground, that scar reminded me everyday what could have happened.

_He's never going back there again_, I thought to myself, knowing that it had to be true.

I ran my finger over it again, almost as if I was trying to erase it. Then I ran a hand over his head, feeling the smoothness of the close shave.

"Go to sleep, Hansen," Billy said quietly, never opening his eyes.

"Will you be here in the morning?" I asked.

"Yes," he told me, eyes still remaining shut. "Now sleep."

I nodded with a smile, even though he couldn't see me. I turned over, closing my eyes, trying to get back to sleep. And just as I was about to fall asleep, I felt him wrap and arm around me, pulling me tightly against him.

"I love you," he whispered. "You know that."

"Just nice to hear you say it. Love you, too."

* * *

**So yeah, thank you to all of my patient readers!! Again, sorry I take so long. And a HUGE thank you to all of my reviewers on chapter 6 and all other chapters. **

** Real quick, though: xNegAttentionx - can't wait for your next chapter!! I'm so going into withdrawal over not having any Isabelle/Jack!! Can't wait to see what you've cooked up for NY!! **

** And I apologize again for not writing notes to all my reviewers,but I gotta be up in four hours for work! **

** Oh, and did everyone just FUCKING LOVE! the new scene in the unrated version of Death Sentence!! I won't spoil it for those who haven't seen it. But if you haven't, get it as soon as you can!! I actually had it a week early because my best friend works at Blockbuster and got it for me! Jealous? Lol, jk.**

**Anyway, hope you enjoyed. More coming soon, promise promise! Please R&R! **


	8. Paying For Your Mistakes

**So so so so so so so so sorry for my lack of an update!! I know, I should burn in the seventh circle of Author's Hell for waiting this long!! But, yeah, just some new life issues were taking place these last few months, and between that and Writer's Block, my fic took the punishment... Anyways, I promise the next one will be sooner!!**

**Disclaimer: You know the drill, Hansen and Bailee are mine, everything else isn't. Love to Garrett Hedlund, Matt O'Leary and James Wan!!**

* * *

_I walked aimlessly around the decrepit house. It was located in an area of abandoned project houses that had started out as a new American dream, but the idea had slowly died off years ago due to lack of interest. That was the story for a lot of structures around this area. It was close to falling apart, void of anything except people and a couple of rancid-looking, mismatched couches scattered here and there. Dirty, dingy paint hung from the walls and there was a faint smell of mildew to the place. _

_I mildly wondered why we were here, but didn't dwell on it so much. It was just the current location of a party, a crappy home for a few junkie squatters. Billy had picked me up and remained quiet the whole way here. Rather than disrupt his silence, I just chewed on my bottom lip and stared out the window as the neighborhoods got shittier and shittier. _

_Finally, we had stopped here. Billy got out of the car, and without a single word, I followed, taking my place by his side, his hand subconsciously finding mine. Inside, he nodded at the people who waved and said their "Hey"'s in his direction, never once letting go of my hand. When he saw Bodie leaning against a wall, we both waved, then Billy turned to me._

_"Go wait with Joe," he said quietly, motioning with his head towards the direction of his younger brother._

_I opened my mouth to object, coming close to putting up a fight, not wanting to be without him while we were here, but instead I just rolled my eyes and clamped my mouth shut, taking a seat next to Joe, folding my arms over my chest and pouting. Without a single look back, Billy followed Bodie towards a hallway then disappeared into one of the rooms. _

_I continued with my ultra boring sitting, talking with Joe for a few, then turning to a kid named Baggie that I knew from around. It was all very strange. No one talked for very long, conversations starting then just falling off. A loud sort of quiet hung in the air, and everyone seemed a bit skittish, though that wasn't too unusual for this crowd, but it all had a sense of uneasiness to it. _

_After sitting by myself for close to twenty minutes, Joe, ever the horny teenager, had left earlier to entertain some girl who had walked up to him, I got up and walked around, mainly looking for Billy. _

_I wandered toward the hallway he had disappeared down with Bodie earlier, but most doors were closed and I knew better then to just open them. At the far end of the hall was what used to be a doorway, but now just a thick black curtain hung there, nailed in place, hushed voices protruding from the other side._

_"We'll get them tonight," said one voice. "Right in their own streets." A few "hell yeah"'s came, voicing an agreement._

_Curiosity got the better of me, and if this was a meeting, I would be sure to find Billy in there. I reached up slowly, getting ready to pull back the makeshift doorway, but a hand suddenly enclosed around my wrist tightly._

_"What do you think you're doing, Hansen?" came Billy's authoritative tone. I jumped and turned to face him._

_"Looking for you," I said quietly, putting my free hand over my heart to try and catch my breath, his hand still holding my other wrist. _

_"I told you to wait with Joe," he countered._

_"Joe went off with some girl," I told him. He sighed and stared down at me for a second._

_"Wait right here," he said. "I'll be right back." And then he disappeared behind the curtain._

_I did as he said, leaning against the wall, waiting for him. I sighed to myself. This night was lousy. At that moment, I didn't know just how bad it was going to get._

_"I'm gonna take her back, then I'll be right back here. Thirty minutes, tops. Then we leave," I heard Billy say through the curtain. I rolled my eyes. Keeping me in the dark again, keeping me "safe". I straightened up, assuming he was coming out momentarily. As Billy walked from the room, I caught a quick peek in. Shiny guns and boxes of ammo spread out on a worn table. My heart caught into my throat and my eyes met Billy's quickly. _

_He knew I had seen and his eyes left mine quickly, not from guilt, Billy never apologized. His eyes left mine because he didn't want to hear me argue. Instead, his hand wrapped around my waist and led me toward the front door. _

_"What's going on?" I asked as soon as we were in the car. _

_"Don't worry about it, Hansen." _

_"Don't tell me not to worry!" I yelled, my voice amplified in the small space of the car. "I know something is up!"_

_He pulled into the gates of Bones's shop and I jetted out of the car before he had a chance to catch me. Infuriation fueled me as I started to make my way back to the group home, ignoring him as he called my name. I hated being treated like I was a baby, or some arm candy. Finally he did catch up to me, grabbing me by my arm._

_"Would you just wait a minute?" he asked as I yanked my arm out of his grasp. "What is your deal?"_

_"What's going on tonight?" I asked again. "And don't tell me 'nothing'! People don't load up with guns and a shit ton of bullets just to go drive around."_

_"Someone made a mistake," he told me seriously, staring down at me with anger flaring in his eyes, his grip on my arm firm. "A very big mistake. And now they have to be held responsible."_

_"That's it?" I yelled incredulously, tears stinging my eyes. "That's all I get? What if you don't come back after this? You'd leave me all alone in this world with just the excuse of 'someone has to pay for a mistake'?"_

_He looked at me with a slight smirk and a curious look, bringing a hand to touch my cheek softly. _

_"That's what you're so worried about? That I won't come back?" he asked, almost chuckling at me. "You worry too much."_

_"How am I supposed to do anything else?" I asked quietly. "If you're not here with me, how is anything supposed to be all right? How do I know you're even still alive if I don't know where you are?"_

_"It's not your job to protect me," he said quietly, pulling my shaking form to him. _

_"Then how am I gonna make sure you come back to me? I can't be without you," I said, my words muffled in his leather coat. I closed my eyes and leaned into him. _

_"And you won't be," he said solemnly. "You want to protect me? Then wear this." He backed up a little, pulling out from beneath his shirt a necklace made from leather cord with a small detailed cross attached. I had always seen him wear it, from the time I first met him. I never saw him as the religious type, but he had always worn that cross, no explanation offered. _

_"What's this?" I asked as he put it over my head, tightening it so it hung about an inch below my neckline. _

_"This," he said, touching it gently, "was the last thing my mother ever gave me. The night she left, she walked into my room and woke me up, giving me the necklace and then leaving. Never saw her again. It's a Celtic cross, meant to provide protection. Or so she told me. But it's gotten me this far."_

_"And if I'm wearing it, how's it gonna protect you?" I asked skeptically. _

_"Because it will protect you," he said simply. "I love you, you know that. If you're safe, then I'll be fine."_

_He presented his argument so illogically, so uncharacteristically, but I still believed every word. The necklace, to me, was a piece of him that I could hold on to when he wasn't around. It was my way of controlling his fate. He could see in my face that he had won._

_"I still don't want you to go," I said quietly, never the one to admit defeat. "I'm still worried."_

_He hugged me to him, my arms going around his neck while his encircled my waist. He pulled me up just enough to kiss the necklace and then kiss me, just a quick peck._

_"I'll be back in just a while," he said calmly. "Wait up for me."_

_I nodded and he kissed me once more before I watched him drive off._

I woke up to the shrilling sound of his cell phone ringing in close proximity to my head.

The dream that I just had was still fresh in my mind, the memories of that night coming back to me. I waited two hours for him to come back that night, sitting on the fire escape, staring at the corner, waiting for his car to come back around the bend. He had returned to me unscratched that night, but that wasn't the last time I had planted myself on the fire escape, awaiting his return.

I felt him lean over me to grab his cell phone off of the nightstand. He laid on his back, lazily bringing the phone to his ear, telling Bodie, who was on the other line, to drop by the apartment later. I turned over and laid my head on his chest as he unconsciously wrapped his free arm around me.

It had been a week since the day at The Office and I had woken up with him next to me everyday. I tried not to think too much about all of it, what had happened that day or the summaries of the crimes he was suspected for. After another argument, he had finally spilled.

He told me four stories of people I had never heard of. Four stories that ended in the demise of those people. Three of them, he was responsible for. The one he wasn't responsible for had been Dog, another SBE member. Pretty much the same run with all of them: junkies get greedy. Greedy people do stupid things. Stupid things that include selling on the wrong corner or not paying off your debt. Billy was a firm believer in the philosophy that everyone has to pay for their mistakes, but not in a religious way. No, on these streets, Billy was God.

There had been barely any news of Mikey in the past week, his death not really registering on any radar. Though he was part of the SBE, his role was minimal. Detective Wallis hadn't paid me any more unexpected visits, and that I was more than just a little glad for, though it meant that she was also getting nowhere in the investigation. Besides, if the police knew, chances were it was old news, they never were the first to know.

But even with no news, Billy took the death as a warning. They killed a member of _his_ gang, and had dared to place the body in _his_ territory. He wasn't taking to it kindly. As I said, Mikey was just a package boy, Billy suspected that he was killed due to his closeness with Joe, he and Joe had been good friends since they were kids. And with all that floating around, security had increased by a great deal. I wasn't allowed to go anywhere alone. Even when I was at the apartment by myself, there were two members of the SBE in a car downstairs, just watching.

Joe had taken the death of Mikey, unsurprisingly, pretty hard. He didn't say much about it, constantly trying to be tough, just like his brother, but he had been really quiet and secretive since he had heard of the untimely demise of his friend, and Joe was never quiet. Ever since he was a kid, he was loud and never really kept anything to himself. And he had started drinking a lot more. I worried about him, and I could see Billy did, too, a lot more than usual.

I rolled over from my back to my side, looking at Billy as he laid there with his eyes closed, but not asleep, cell phone laying on his bare chest with his hand over it.

"Good morning," I whispered, scooting closer to him. He quickly shot up his eyebrows in response pulling me closer with his other arm. I smiled to myself, arranging my head on his chest. I closed my eyes and sighed, but I knew there was no way I was getting back to sleep. Looking over at the alarm clock, I shut it off. No need for an alarm, I was already up forty-five minutes before it was due to go off. Thank you, Bodie.

I turned my head towards Billy and lightly kissed his neck before leaving bed, finding pajamas from early last night on the floor next to the bed. I put them on and made my way to the kitchen, the brand new day needing to start with some kind of breakfast.

In the kitchen, though, I found a surprise. A young girl sat at our little table, small and petite, her head laying in her hands. She wore a wifebeater and a pair of plaid pajama pants that I recognized as Joe's.

"Hi," I said, coming up behind her. She jumped at the sound of my voice. She looked over at me. She wasn't too much younger than me, 17 at least. Her long blonde hair was down, slightly frizzed from just waking up, but other than her hair, she didn't seem to have gotten much sleep. Her eyes were bloodshot, but the kind you get from crying, not a high. This wasn't one of Joe's random one-nighters.

She lifted her eyes to mine and gave me a small, nervous smile, then returned to staring into her coffee cup so intently, I thought she might evaporate it with laser vision or something.

Billy walked into the kitchen behind me, making his way straight to the coffee pot.

"Who's this?" he asked, not looking up from pouring his coffee.

"Beats me," I said with a shrug, sitting at the table, across from our unknown guest. Her eyes darted around nervously, not focusing on anything for very long, looking like she was about to break down in tears again.

"This is Bailee," Joe said, coming into the kitchen from his room. "You remember? Mikey's sister."

_So that would explain the crying_, I thought to myself.

"She just got in from North Carolina last night and needed a place to stay," Joe explained, coming to stand behind her chair. "She's supposed to go talk to Detective Wallis today."

"Is it okay if I use your shower?" she finally spoke, looking up from her cup and to Billy and then to me.

"Of course," I told her kindly. "Feel free to use anything you need."

She nodded a thanks and then stood up, turning back towards the direction of Joe's room. They locked eyes and Joe placed a comforting hand on her shoulder, then watched as she walked away.

When she was out of sight, he turned back to us and made his way over to the coffee pot. Billy was leaning with his back against the counter, still next to the coffee, looking at his younger brother with raised eyebrows. Joe adamantly refused to meet his gaze.

"Little Bailee Nuryan?" Billy asked casually, taking sip of his coffee.

"Shut up, Billy," Joe said, focusing fixedly on preparing his coffee, which he took black, which didn't leave him much to focus on.

Billy smirked at his brother's quick irritation. "If memory serves, you had quite the craze for her back in high school."

"That was a long time ago," Joe said through a tightened jaw. Suddenly, the realization came to me, too.

"I remember her!" I exclaimed quietly, not wanting her to hear us.

When Joe came to live with us, a year and a half ago when we moved in, Mikey and his sister were always over here, too. That was, until Joe quit school and then the Nuryans moved to North Carolina, but Mikey was eighteen by then and stayed in Boston, spending the night in Joe's room for the first few weeks before moving in with Baggy and then to his own place.

"Jesus, guys, that was like a year ago," whined the eighteen-year-old.

"Didn't know you two kept in touch," I added with a smirk.

"Doesn't matter," Joe said, sullenly. "She ain't here on vacation."

"I'm taking her over to the station," Joe added, sneaking a glance at his brother, who was staring at him.

"You got work today, Joe," he said calmly, but pointedly.

"I know," Joe said immediately. "She just asked if I would take her over there. She didn't want to go alone. I'll get my shit done."

"You better," Billy said seriously.

"And make sure you take Baggy with you," Billy added, ignoring the betrayed look Joe was giving him. "To the police station and to work. Don't step foot outside without him." I wasn't the only one with upped security. Joe always had to have someone with him, and his errand running had cut down a lot. I didn't know if that was due to his upped amount of alcohol intake, or if Billy was just worried. Maybe both.

Billy placed his coffee cup in the sink and then made his way to the bedroom, returning only a moment later in jeans and a tight black shirt. I looked over at the clock, ten o'clock. I had two hours before work.

"Heco will be here at 11:30 to walk with you to the Four Roses," Billy told me, making sure I knew I wasn't off the hook.

"Heco?" I asked incredulously. "Heco's always late!"

"So you'll be late to work," he said with a shrug. He walked over to the front door and I followed, standing with my arms crossed over my chest, watching as he put on his coat, his back turned to me.

"I can't be late to work," I whined. Billy paused in his movements, letting out a quiet sigh. He turned to face me.

"Heco'll be here at 11:30 to walk with you to work," he said, matter-of-factly, his arms also crossed over his chest. He leaned down slightly, his face an inch away from mine. "You'll wait here for him, even if he's late. Don't walk outta this apartment by yourself."

"You're being ridiculous," I told him sternly. His eyes got narrowed to slits.

"I'm being ridiculous?" he asked loudly. "I'm trying to keep you fucking safe!"

"And you've been doing that for years without me having to have a fucking babysitter every second of the day!" I yelled, holding my ground.

"Don't you get it, Hansen? You've been in this life long enough to realize what's going on!" he yelled. "Someone's fucking with _my_ shit! And to fuck with _me_, they'll fuck with _you_ or _Joe_. So, for now, when I can't be there, you'll have a _fucking_ babysitter."

I just stood there, staring at him. He stared back, his gaze unfaltering. I hated being treated like a child, even if every word he spoke was true.

"Fine," I mumbled, breaking our staring contest and heading to the bedroom.

I heard him sigh as I was leaving. I heard his heavy boots start to follow me, and for dramatic effect, I slammed the door in his face. I heard him let out an angry growl from the other side, then the door opened and shut loudly again. I was pulling clothes out of the dresser when I felt him behind me.

"Hey," he said, wrapping his arms around my waist, kissing my neck. I barely responded, just moving my head a little to the side to allow him better access, more out of habit than anything else, but nothing more than that. Frustrated with my childish antics, he sat on the bed, reaching up to take one of my hands.

"Look at me," he said quietly, but sternly. I turned to face him. His hands went to my hips and pulled me closer to him, wrapping his arms completely around my waist. He rested his head on my stomach as I ran my hands over his scalp.

"I know you want to protect me," I said softly, "but I can walk myself to work."

"I love you," he said, softly but hard at the same time. "I will do anything to protect you, whether you like it or not. I _need_ you to be safe. So just do this for me: Wait for Heco. He'll be here."

I let out another sigh and nodded my head. He let go of my waist and I went to go walk out of the room when he grabbed my hand. I turned to look at him. His face held a serious expression, but not of agitation as I would expect, but one of worry and concern. He leaned down and kissed me, holding me close to him.

"Ever so protective," I whispered into his chest.

"Ever so naive," he countered, kissing the top of my head, then walked past me and out of the door.

* * *

**Yeah, so more to come! And a lot sooner!!**

**Many thanks to all my devoted readers!! Please review!!**


	9. No Matter What It Takes

**A/N: Again, I know I take FOREVER to update, but you know you love me and my OCs!! Ha!! R&R!**

**Disclaimer: Even though I did print two copies and give them to my friends who have no access to internet at home, they didn't pay me. I swear it. So that means I'm still pulling a bizillion hours at work, meaning I'm still not making any money off my writing, and I would never do that because I don't own Billy, or Joe, or most of the gang, along with that asshole Bones. So yeah, bottom line: I don't own anyone you recognize from outside reading my story. Basically: I write this to entertain, not to pay the bills, so don't sue me. I give credit where credits due. **

* * *

Eleven forty two. It was fucking eleven forty two and that dope fiend was nowhere in sight! _Shit!_ I screamed in my head, throwing my cigarette over the balcony where I was keeping watch and then headed back inside. Of all the people he could possibly entrust with this, he had to go and pick that needle-loving son of a bitch! Damn it!

"Fuck this," I muttered to myself. I don't care what I told Billy, I had to get to work.

I tried calling Billy for the third time, but once again, all I got was voicemail. With a final look out of the window, only to see that Heco had _still _not shown up yet, I left the apartment, locking the five locks.

Walking down the crumpled streets of our neighborhood, I held my leather motorcycle jacket close to me, keeping my arms tightly around me, my head down, eyes up, pepper spray close in reach. That was what I learned from being with Billy, though he walked with his head held high, exerting his authority to even just passing strangers, I knew I wasn't as strong as him. I kept a keen knowing of my surroundings, but I did my best to be invisible.

So far, nothing was wrong, and I was walking with a little more confidence. Billy's paranoia had rubbed off on me upon first exiting the apartment by myself, along with a little guilt for not listening to him. He had a right to be worried, I just hated being treated like a child. In the foster system, you may have "parents", but it's more of raising yourself. So when someone comes along and tries to coddle me, I have a tendency to lash out.

I had three more blocks to go before I reached the bar, and I was sure I had surpassed any danger that could have fallen upon me, when suddenly I heard footsteps behind me. At first, I paid no attention to them. I mean, come on, it was a public street, other people walked on it too. But when I sped up, they sped up. When I crossed the street, a second later, they were crossing the street.

I had one more final turn to go before the bar was in sight. I held in my sigh of relief, wanting to let it out when I finally did feel safe. But instead, my sigh of relief turned into a gasp of surprise when I felt one had grab tightly onto my arm, then another came around the front to cover my mouth. I had no chance to see my attacker as they dragged me into an alley. Then, my whole world went black.

--

Billy took a final count of the money before placing it back into the knapsack. It was all there. That should make that fat fuck happy. Oh, who was he kidding? Nothing ever made Bones happy. They could go four grand more then what they were supposed to, but that bastard would still find something to bitch about.

_Whatever,_ Billy thought to himself. Truth was, he wasn't really thinking much about getting Bones his money these days. All he could think about these days was what was going to happen next. He had expected Mikey's death. He hadn't wanted it, but he had been expecting it was coming. What else can you expect when you try to screw everyone around you?

He still had not told anybody about to conversation that had taken place at The Four Roses the night before Mikey's untimely demise.

_Billy walked back into the Four Roses right behind Hansen as they came in from out back where she was taking her smoke break. He hid the smile that was trying to come out as he checked her out from behind. Tonight she was wearing a short jean skirt and a low cut black halter top that dipped low in the back, too._

"_Oh, before I forget," she said, turning back to face him. "Mikey was looking for you earlier. Said he's gotta talk to ya. Told him I'd pass the message along."_

_Billy nodded and kissed Hansen once more before she went back towards the bar to get her tray and get back to work. Continuing to keep his eyes on her, Billy also scanned the room for Bodie, finally finding him at the usual table with the rest of the crew. Billy had a feeling he knew what Mikey needed to talk to him about. He had been catching wind of a major fuck-up that could start something pretty major if not handled soon. What was worse was that word had it, an SBE member was covered in it up to his elbows, but no one was saying who. Now, suddenly Mikey needs to talk to him? Something ain't right. No matter how much Joey stood up for the kid, Mikey was still Mikey. So, with knowing all of that, Billy knew he was going to need another set of ears listening to whatever story Mikey was about to spin._

_With a slight movement of his head, he saw Bodie start to make his was over to him. They both traveled to a more secluded table near the back, then Bodie went to fetch Mikey._

_Bodie took a seat next to Billy, handing him a beer. Mikey remained standing in of the table scratching at his arms, fidgeting. Billy took notice of the track marks and the red nose. Shooting and snorting, trademarks of a new junkie. They start with the snorting then move on to shooting up. Never a good sign when they had progressed that far. How'd that quote from Hansen's book go? _"If you're gonna sniff it, you might as well pop it, and if you're gonna pop it, you might as well mainline…" _Truer words were never spoken by a junkie._

"_You been looking for me, Mikey?" Billy asked._

"_Well, yeah," Mikey said uncertainly, still shifting a lot. "Kinda, I guess. I kinda need to talk to ya 'bout something."_

"'_Kinda'?" Billy asked incredulously. "You go to my girl asking for me when you're only _kinda_ looking for me? C'mon, Michael, you know better than that. Plus, I've been hearing a lot of shit, a lot of bad shit. And I been hearin' that an SBE member is dick deep in this shit. And I don't like that, I don't like not knowing what the fuck is goin' on in my own goddamned neighborhood. Now, you suddenly running to Hansen, saying you need to talk to me? Well, then you's better start talkin'. And fast."_

"_I didn't know, Billy!" Mikey suddenly came out with. "You gotta believe me, I didn't know! I swear on my sister's life, I really didn't know!"_

"_Whoa, whoa!" Billy exclaimed, slamming his beer onto the table. "Before we start swearing on other people's lives, especially Bailee's, you better start telling me what you didn't know then that you suddenly know now. And you better tell me why I'm only hearin' about it now, when the shit is gettin' ready to hit the fucking fan."_

"_I fucked up," Mikey told them, staring at the ground. "I fucked up real bad and now I got all of B-Street after me. I don't know what to do!"_

"_You keep telling me the same thing over and over again," Billy told him, lighting up a cigarette. "You keep tellin' me you didn't know and that you fucked up. But you ain't telling me how. And you can tell me how the hell B-Street is involved in this, because everyone I heard shit from are Mack runners."_

_Mikey's face visibly lost any color that it had left when Billy mentioned that he had heard the rumors from the Cutty Macks. _

"_I…" Mikey stuttered. "I-I-I… I stole some shit. I was double dealing, selling for you and B-Street to try and cover some my debts."_

_Billy was infuriated. He was selling for him and a rival? Who the fuck did he think he was? And what the fuck did he steal? And what fucking debts would he have? Billy kept all his questions to himself, though, waiting for Mikey to continue._

"_I got into a bad habit," Mikey admitted. "I started using, and I didn't want you to know. So soon, I was buying from anyone I ran into. And then I was borrowing. And-and… And soon I was in over my head and I owed everybody. They even called Bailee in North Carolina, trying to get her to pay for me._

"_So I was gonna try and make some money to start paying everybody back, but I was selling for two gangs and was still barely breaking even. So one night I went to B-Street's cookhouse and stole some shit they were gonna throw out anyway. But, I swear Billy, I didn't know why they was throwin' it out. I just thought it was duddy shit, you know? Thought it was just cheap. But it wasn't! And I didn't know."_

_Billy just continued to stare at him. He gave a glance over to Bodie, who gave him one back. This was not good. Not good at all. The shit Mikey stole and then sold, it killed two kids and put four more in the hospital. It was a bad batch. Very bad. _

"_So now I'm so fucked and I don't know what to do," Mikey finished. "Everyone's after me."_

"_So now you decide to come to me and come clean?" Billy asked. "You have any idea what this could do? You're a proclaimed member of the SBE. That means all your shit comes back on me. And that means you put my family in jeopardy, too."_

"_Please, Billy!" Mikey pleaded quietly, trying not to attract any attention from the other patrons. "They're already going after my family. They called my baby sister, threatened her. Please, I'm beggin' ya. Anything you can do to help. I'm so sorry I fucked up." _

_Billy stared at him for a good minute then looked to Bodie again, noticing Hansen in the background, cleaning off a table close to them. _Nosey girl_, Billy thought to himself with a laugh. He knew just by looking at Hansen over there that he would have to help Mikey, if only to try and keep any danger from befalling unto his home life. He couldn't have anything happen to that girl. People liked to claim that Billy had no heart, was cold and merciless. But he wasn't, and she was living proof of that, her and Joey, the only family he'd ever known. So he had to protect her. Because no matter what, you have to protect what's yours. _

_Billy met eyes with Bodie and gave a small nod. Bodie knew what that meant. They were going to help this kid. They both turned back to look at Mikey._

"_I'll do what I can," Billy said. "I'm not makin' any promises, but I'll see if I can clean this up some."_

_Mikey looked like someone had just taken the rope from around his neck, letting him go. He nodded quickly, thanking Billy many times over again._

"_Now get outta here," Billy told him. "Go through the back door, stay home. I'll call you tomorrow. And no usin'."_

"_I promise Billy," Mikey said. "No more usin'."_

"_Good," Billy said. "Now go."_

And that was the last time he saw Mikey. Didn't even know he was dead 'til the next morning.

Only he, Bodie, and Mikey knew anything about the contents of that meeting, but Billy was beginning to suspect that maybe someone else knew. Hell, even the cops had caught wind of it. But if someone else knew, then that meant Billy was the next in line to meet the same fate as Mikey. He was the boss, the leader, and with that power came that responsibility. Everyone pays for their mistakes, Billy lived by that, but he also knew that, in his position on top, sometimes you had to pay for others' mistakes, too.

Billy sighed once again, picking up the bag. No matter what was going on though, he still had bridges to cross, and to do that, you still have to pay the toll. Time to call Bodie to make the drop with him. He reached for the inside pocket of his jacket where he usually placed his phone, but it wasn't there. He checked his other pockets. Nope, nothing but a pack of cigarettes in one and some pocket lint in another.

Billy walked down the two flights of stairs, heading for his car. There was that damn thing, sitting on the passenger seat. He reached in and grabbed it as he heard it beep with a missed call.

_Scratch that_, he thought to himself as the screen showed four missed calls. He checked the list. All from Hansen. He chuckled to himself. She probably called to bitch about Heco being late to pick her up. He called her back, but after four rings, voicemail picked up.

Billy looked down at his phone, his head slightly tilting to the side, as his brow scrunched together in confusion. She never missed his calls. In the past three years that he had been calling her, he had never reached voicemail. Hell, he didn't even know that she had voicemail. Immediately, he called her again. Still no answer. Even if she was at work, or pissed as hell at him, she always picked up.

Now worry was beginning to flood over him. The next call he immediately placed was to the bar.

"Four Roses," Sammy grumbled.

"It's Billy," he said. "My girl there?"

"Nope," Sammy said casually. "She ain't here. Half hour late. Everything okay?"

Billy hung up without another word, dialing Heco's number quickly.

"Yo, Billy," Heco greeted in a jovial manner.

"You better fucking be tellin' me you're with Hansen right now," Billy told him, rage dripping from his voice.

"No, Billy, I'm not with her," Heco said cautiously, the joy in his voice now gone. "Got held up waiting for a payment."

Billy hung up. He was reaching his boiling point, more with worry than anger. She wasn't answering, Heco didn't have her, she wasn't at the bar. _Where the fuck could she be?_ he thought.

He dialed another number.

"Hansen's missing," he told the person before they could even get out a greeting.

--

Joe rolled his eyes at his brother and his brother's girl. _Hansen always has to pick a fight_, he thought to himself with a small smile. But that smile, as small as it might have been disappeared quickly with a look to the ground and slight shake of his head. Joe really had no room to talk, he picked a fight with Billy over almost all the rules Billy had laid down in the past. But not today. Today he didn't care, he had bigger things worry about.

As Billy stomped after Hansen into their bedroom, Joe looked up at the clock. Ten after ten. Bailee should be outta the shower by now. With a heavy sigh, he got up from the kitchen chair and headed toward his bedroom.

He stopped and leaned against the doorway, watching Bailee brush her hair, still wrapped up in a towel. He remembered the last time he had seen her.

_Joe was over at the Nuryans', helping Mikey pack up his stuff to move it into Joe's apartment that he shared with Billy and Hansen. He liked living with them. Hansen was like a sister to him, and she protected him from Billy when he fucked up too bad. And now, his good friend, Mikey, was going to come live with them for a while until he found his own place._

_Another reason he was there was today was the last day that the Nuryans would be in Boston. Tomorrow morning Mr. and Mrs. Nuryan were moving to North Carolina, along with Bailee Nuryan, Mikey's little sister. Joe had been carrying a secret torch for her since he was twelve, and now she was leaving, probably to never come back._

_Mikey packed another box into his parents' car. They were going to take him to drop off the load at the apartment while Joe stayed behind to pack some more. Mikey and his parents weren't exactly the best of friends, but he was still trying to spend a little bit of time with them before they left, so he decided to take the drive with them to drop off some of his stuff. _

_Joe looked up from the box he was packing, looking towards Mikey's doorway. Bailee's room was right next to his. He then got up and made his way to her room._

_Joe stood quietly not daring to go past her doorframe. He watched as she recklessly threw her things randomly into boxes. _

_Bailee hated that her parents were moving her. The following year was supposed to be her senior year. She wanted to graduate with her friends, not with a ton of strangers. She didn't want to go to a new place and make new friends, she didn't want to leave her friends, her school… She didn't want to leave her life here in Boston. As she looked up, surprised to see Joe standing in her doorway, she knew she didn't want to leave him and the feelings she felt for him behind either. _

"_Hey," he said with a small smile and a glance towards the ground. _

"_Hey," she said back, reflecting the smile that he had given to her. She watched as he nervously entered her almost-packed room, looking at the now bare walls, seeing a look of what she could of sworn was disappointment on his face. Disappointed she was moving? Sad to see her go? That was almost too much to hope for. _

_Joe walked slowly over to Bailee, taking her hands in his._

"_Uh," he started nervously, his eyes staying locked on their hands, too nervous to look up at her face. "There's kinds something I've been wantin' to tell ya." He then, finally, looked up to see her eyes, a small glimmer of hope in them, giving him more confidence. _

"_I've kinda been wantin' to do something for a long time, and I was wondering if you'd be okay with me tryin' something real quick," he finally got out._

_Bailee nodded slowly, and Joe smiled for a split second. He moved his hands to her face, cradling her head. Tilting her head back slightly, Joe slowly placed a sweet, slow kiss on her lips. Bailee and Joe reveled in this stolen moment, pulling each other closer as the kiss intensified. Then their lips parted, coming up for air, still holding each other close. _

That day, barely even a year ago, Joe thought he would never see Bailee again. Now, here she was, back in his life, even for just a moment. But now, everything was different. Things had spiraled so far out of control, and now, whatever reunion Joe had envisioned they would have was blown to smithereens with two simple, life shattering words his brother had delivered him: "Mikey's dead."

Bailee caught Joe's eye in the reflection of the mirror atop his dresser. She turned to look over at him, tears shining in her beautiful blue eyes. Joe opened up his arms and Bailee collapsed into them once again.

"It's gonna be okay," he cooed softly into her hair. "I'm here for you. You're going to be fine."

"But it's not okay," she sobbingly protested. "He's gone Joe, he's not coming back."

"I know," Joe told her, feeling a sad anger rise in him, making him choke on his words slightly. No, he couldn't choke up on anything. Not right now, not when she needed him to be strong.

"C'mon, Bails," he nudged when her tears had started to subside. "We gotta be there soon. You gotta get ready to go."

Bailee lifted her head from his shoulder, nodding while staring at the ground. As she turned to go back to her brushing, Joe caught her arm. He pulled her back to him, one hand coming up to cradle her face while his other fell to her hip. Bailee met his gaze, and, for the longest moment, they just stared.

Joe wanted nothing more than to kiss her again, as he had done in her room that day. With all the thoughts running through his head, he heard the voice of his deceased best friend loud and clear. _Trying to cop a feel on my baby sister when she's here to plan my fucking funeral?_ he could hear Mikey's chuckle ringing in his ears. _That's real nice Joey, even by your standards. _

Joey bit back the laugh that was threatening to escape, knowing he couldn't find a way to explain it to Bailee. Instead, Joe placed a loving kiss on her forehead, giving her a small smile of encouragement. She smiled back, then returned to getting ready.

Now Joe and Baggy stood outside the local police station, smoking a cigarette while waiting for Bailee to get out.

"So," Baggy said, a small chuckle coming out. "Bailee Nuryan, back in Boston. Can you believe it?"

"Shut up, Baggy," Joe said back, smiling slyly at his friend.

"Who knows, maybe you two…" Baggy trailed off. Joe shot a look at him. "You know…" Baggy continued, wiggling his eyebrows. Joe slapped him on the arm, trying to fight the smile that was coming out across his face.

"I don't know, man," Joe told him, flicking his cigarette into the street. "All I can do right now is keep her calm. Maybe when this whole mess is over."

"Yeah," Baggy agreed. "Maybe."

Joe felt his phone vibrate in his pocket, followed by the standard ring. Joe nodded towards Baggy, turning his back to him and walking a couple steps away. Before Joe could even say hello, his brother's voice came through the speaker.

"Hansen's missing," he told him.

"What are you talkin' about?" Joe asked, unable to comprehend what exactly his brother meant.

"Missing, Joe," Billy reiterated. "She ain't answering her phone, she ain't at the bar, and Heco never came and got her."

"What do you need me to do?" Joe asked, hearing the anger and worry in his brother's voice.

"You still at the cop shack?" Billy asked.

"Yeah, Bailee hasn't got out yet," Joe confirmed.

"As soon as she get's out, you two go with Baggy back the apartment," Billy instructed. "Call me as soon as you get there, call me."

"Okay."

--

Billy hung up after speaking with his brother. He hoped to God that she was there. Whatever reason she had for not answering her phone he would forgive in a second as long as he knew she was safe.

The next call he made was to Bodie, to round everybody up at the Office. Though he didn't want to think it, his brain automatically assumed the worst. If she was truly missing, if someone had taken her, Billy would tear down every building in Boston, brick by brick, to find her. If she was… He couldn't even think it, but if she didn't come back to him safely, the blood bath that would befall this city was unfathomable.

Billy waited impatiently for the call from his brother. He sat in a pew in the chapel of the Office, watching his phone, his leg bouncing as wildly as the needle of a tattoo gun. Suddenly, Bodie burst through the doors of the chapel and Billy turned quickly to se him.

"No word yet?" Bodie asked. Billy didn't even have to answer the question, the anger that blazed in his eyes answer enough.

Just as they began to join the rest of the boys in the cook room, Billy's phone went off.

"Joe?" Billy knew, not having to look at the screen to see who was calling.

"She ain't here, Billy," Joe told him. "The locks were all locked. Her purse, her phone, and her jacket are all gone."

"Get to the Office now," Billy told him before hanging up without another word from either one of them. Billy then turned to Bodie. "Get Dog and Jaime out there now. Have them comb the path Hansen takes for work. Talk to everyone. Someone had to have seen her out there."

Bodie left without a word, going off to send the boys off, leaving Billy in the chapel.

Billy looked up at the crumbling angel statue that still sat at the head of the church area. Billy didn't pray, he wouldn't even know where to begin to do so, but right now, Billy knew one thing and one thing only, God or no God.

"I don't care what it takes," he vowed to that angel, "I don't care how much blood has to be shed. I'll get her back. Alive."

* * *

**So, I really need your advice. I did a change up on the POVs, allowing you to know more what's going on in the heads of the other people. Please tell me what you think! Any criticism would be helpful!! Thank you!!**


	10. Time to Wake Up

A/N: Okay, so I had this semi-long and witty author's note going on, along with a very blasphemous disclaimer that was totally great, but totally pulled some crap on me saying that I had not logged in (even though I was in the document-editing page where I am now...) and totally deleted it all! So, yeah, long story shot (too late!), here is ch. 10 and ch. 11 is on it's way a whole-hell-of-a-lot sooner than it took to grind out 10! Mainly because it's already written on paper, just needs to get onto the computer....

Disclaimer: I don;t own anything that you recognize from anywhere other than my story, and, no, I'm not making money off of this!

Happy reading!

* * *

Two days. She had been missing now for two days and there had still been no word leaked, no leads, just nothing. Dog and Jaime had gone over Hansen's path to work with a fine-tooth comb and had returned nothing. Nobody saw her, or at least that's what they said. It was like she had just vanished, like she was never there to begin with. And Billy knew that the longer they went without finding her, the chances of finding her alive were getting smaller and smaller.

In these two days, Billy had been refusing to go home, avoiding the apartment, _their _home, since she disappeared. But now here he stood, in front of the door, not willing to face the emptiness that lay on the other side. He wouldn't even be standing here if it hadn't been for Bodie.

"_Go home," his lieutenant had commanded him. "You're no use to her or us if you're walking around half dead."_

Had it been anyone else to order him like that, Billy would have given them the ass-chewing of their life, if he didn't put a bullet in their skull first, but he knew Bodie was right. Any sleep or rest he'd been desperately needing, he'd been taking in twenty minute intervals while sitting in the chapel, but it still had left him exhausted, shortening the already miniscule fuse on his temper.

_Well_, he told himself, _I can't sleep out here in the hallway. Faster I get some rest, faster I can get back to what's important._

And with that, Billy fished his keys from his pocket, unlocking the multiple locks, and then placed his keys back into his pocket. As he reached out to open the door, he quickly retracted his hand, bringing it up to his face, nervously wiping his nose. His hand was shaking at the thought of the desolate household.

Due to habit, Billy looked around him, making sure no one caught his trembling. He was glad that Joe had opted to stay at the Office; it wasn't in him to show that kind of weakness to anyone, including his baby brother.

With one final sigh, Billy rapidly pushed open the door, watching it swing back slowly. His stomach felt like it had dropped through the floor; he could almost see Hansen running towards him, ready to jump into his arms at the sight of him, the way she did when they first moved in together.

Billy walked determinedly through the ghost and towards the bedroom, shedding his jacket and placing it on the back of a chair on his way. First and for most, he decided he needed a shower.

He stood underneath the showerhead, one hand against the wall supporting his weight as he let the steaming hot water roll off of his body. Though the pressure of the water and the steam was helping with his physical tension, he could feel the gears in his mind working on overtime, yet getting nowhere.

Anger at this whole situation was taking over and clouding his brain. There was no solution in reach, no clues to lead to getting her back, just enormous clouds of despair. And as the hopelessness rose, coming over him in a fit of rage, Billy slammed a punch at the shower wall, cracking the tile into tiny fragments that fell to the bottom of the tub.

Sitting on the edge of the bed, he put on a new pair of boxers, lying back onto the pillows. The smell of cherry vanilla and cigarettes suddenly infiltrated his nose, and Billy sat straight up, rubbing his face. He couldn't sleep here, not in their bed, not while knowing she wasn't in it.

In desperate need of a smoke, Billy walked out onto the balcony. He sat in one of the chairs, lighting up a cigarette. After a deep drag, he watched as the smoke from the end of his cigarette swirled in obscure patterns.

_Billy parked outside of the home, dropping her off for the night. It had been a silent ride back from the party, his pre-initiation party. He didn't know what to say to her. He knew she had been dreading this day, the destiny that lay before him had caused quite a number of fights. But what could he do? This was who he was before she had come into his life. This was who he was going to be, this is who he had to be. _

_Instead of saying anything at all, he just leaned over to kiss her before he had to go. But when he did, she surprised him by wrapping her arms around his neck, pulling him closer, not letting go. The kiss deepened for a moment, it was new yet familiar and before he could place these feelings, she let go. He could see the tears in her eyes that she was trying her best to hold back. She was scared, and she had every right to be. There were no comforting words he could give her, so he just ignored the tears, knowing they weren't going to change what was to be done._

_"What was that for?" he asked regarding that kiss, a shadow of a smile laced with confusion playing on his lips. _

_"Because I love you," she had told him quickly, getting the words out before she chose otherwise. "And because I want you to be safe. Come back to me in one piece, okay?" _

_He kissed her once more, just a quick one, meant to promise her that he would come back. She gave him a simple nod in understanding, and then exited the car. He watched her in the rearview mirror, watched her stand on the foot of the stairs in front of the home, watching him drive away._

He hadn't told her at that moment, but there was no denying it: He loved her. That was the bottom line. He loved that girl and everything that she represented for him. Since the moment he saw her sitting on the steps of that group home, he knew she would be his. A cocky thing to think, but that was the truth of it. She was a permanent fixture in his life, even back then, sitting on those steps, neither one having to talk, just knowing the other was there was enough. She gave him so many things that he never thought he'd have: love, family, a future.

A future. Never in his wildest dreams did he think he might've had one of those. Hell, he'd made it into his twenties, not something he'd think would ever happen. He'd been running drugs and other various illegal items for Bones since he was eleven, he was sure that one day someone would pick him off, end his life to save some money. But, now here he was, twenty two and still alive, with a whole lot more than he'd ever thought he'd have.

And family, she'd made that. Sure, he and Joe looked after one another, but Billy knew that one day he and his brother would go their separate ways, always connected by blood and the gang, but not always together. But she had given him the kind of family you come home to everyday, a home and the love of a good women. The all-American dream he never thought he'd have.

Above all, she loved him, unconditionally. He thought he'd lost her that day in the Office. He'd been sure he'd come home to find her gone. And all day he had resented her for making him feel guilty about that, blamed her for him wanting more. He would have been fine having nothing but the gang and his, for lack of a better word, "job", but she had introduced him to more and he was almost mad at her for it. But when he got home that night, she wasn't gone. He walked through the door and found her waiting for him, telling him that she was always going to be there. And she had meant it, proved it even. She'd always been there. Even if he hadn't loved her, which he did very much so, he owed it to her to get her out of this danger.

Still halfway expecting Hansen to walk out onto the balcony and wrap her arms around him, Billy fell fast asleep out in that folding chair.

-----------------------------

"_Billy…" Hansen called. He heard her calling him, her voice like the wind, carrying his name to his ears. He felt her warm breath on his ear, her arms wrapped around him. "Baby, wake up."_

"_C'mon, babe," she sweetly whined. "Please wake up."_

_Billy opened his eyes slowly, turning over to face her. They were in their bed, she was right there, right in front of him, wrapped in sheet just as she was every morning, staring at him lovingly, but there was something hidden in her eyes. She had a small smile on her face, but her eyes held fear and worry. He gave her a quizzical look, wanting to ask what she was worried about, but before he could, she spoke again._

"_You have to wake up," she told him, the anxiety spreading into her voice. "You have to come find me. Please, you have to save me. Please…"_

_She just kept saying please over and over again, first sweetly until it turned into a pleading, like the way someone pleaded for their life. Then, with an ear piercing scream of fright, she was gone. _

Billy woke up with a start, nearly falling out of the chair as he sat straight up. He checked his watch; he'd been asleep for four hours. He lit a cigarette, shaking off the ghost of her embrace, wiping his nose as he shook himself to wake up some more. He could still see her, just as she was in his dream, her body covered with a sheet. He remembered her words. _"You have to save me…" _But most of all, he remembered that scream as it still echoed in his ears.

After throwing his cigarette over the ledge, he walked inside, putting on some clean clothes. Sleep had been good for him, though the waking up part now left him with an underlying guilt. But now there would be no mercy.

As he dressed, he called Bodie, telling him to gather everybody and meet up at the Office.

---------------

Billy parked in front of the stairs at the entrance to the building, he didn't care about trying to hide his car, he knew what was going to happen now, knew what the next step was.

He found everyone gathered in the cook room, standing there silently, awaiting his order. He looked out over the gathered troops and remembered each and every one of them from when they were all kids, running the streets, not in power, but for the fun of it. They had all grown up together, became family. He'd be damned if anyone of them didn't think the same. They weren't sentimental people, they just had their facts: Your family is your family, and you protect what's yours.

"For the past two days," he began, "We've been taking it easy, trying to move under the radar. Now, two days later, we still have no results. It's time to play hardball, boys. I don't care who you have to kill, how you gotta torture 'em, I want answers. We consider ourselves a family, and Hansen has been a part of this family for years. They, whoever _they_ are, have taken one of ours. Now we're going to find out who, by whatever means necessary. And I mean _whatever means necessary_."

* * *

Joe unlocked the door, letting Bailee enter before him. Taking one last look around the hallway, his brother's paranoid habits having rubbed off on him sometime in life, Joe closed and relocked the door.

He was beat, physically exhausted. He had been out all day and night for the past two days, trying to find just one tiny bit of information on what had happened to Hansen. He was just as frantic as Billy on this whole matter. Hansen was, by every definition, his sister. True, they weren't blood related, but what did that matter? Especially when the people you were connected to by blood were the lowest forms of shit that you knew. With the exception of his brother, Hansen was the only other person who he actually felt like he mattered to.

Sure, he knew that Bodie and the rest of the gang would defend him, put their own lives on the line for his, but Hansen was the one who sat with him at the clinic when his tattoo got infected, the girl who took care of him when his brother had gone to jail, the one who had bought him birthday presents and made their tiny apartment into the first place where he actually felt like he had a home, not just a place to crash.

Joe heaved one more sigh and then collapsed on the couch. Bailee came and sat down next to him, letting out her own long sigh.

"You look tired," she said quietly, looking over at Joe.

"I am," Joe admitted, laying his head on her shoulder.

"So go rest," she told him with a shake of her head.

"Come with me," he said, standing up. He offered her a hand, which she accepted, and lifted her into a standing position. She stood close to him, barely even an inch between the two of them, staring into each other's eyes. Bailee reached up, cupping Joe's face with her hand. Joe leaned into her touch, closing his eyes at the softness of her hand and wrapping his arms around her waist.

Without thinking, Bailee stood on her toes and placed a soft kiss on Joe's lips. Joe deepened the kiss and his hold on her tightened as her arms wrapped around his neck. He kept his hands in the same spot, never reaching for the bottom hem of her shirt or between her legs, just held her close to him. Then he pulled away.

Bailee opened her eyes and looked up at him, an unspoken "Why?" written across her brow. Joe smiled down at her and kissed her forehead.

"C'mon," Joe told her, taking both of her hands in his. "Let's go rest."

Joe led her to his bedroom and they both kicked off their shoes, Joe stripping down to his boxers and Bailee into one of Joe's wifebeaters and his pajama pants. After climbing in, Joe pulled Bailee up against him and she tucked her head underneath his chin as he pulled the blanket around them.

"As much as I wish this was under better circumstances," Bailee whispered to Joe, "I'm really glad I came back."

"Me, too," Joe told her, placing another kiss on her forehead.

* * *

Baggie and Dawg walked the path that Hansen took to work once more. It was about the fiftieth time they had tried to do this, but neither one of them was about to fight Billy on the subject. He was out for blood and they weren't about to end up on the wrong end of the gun. So, here they were, walking the path to the Four Roses, hoping to find some new shred of evidence to lead to the safe return of Hansen, not only a large part of Billy and Joe's life, but the whole gang's.

"Do you think we're gonna find anything?" Dawg asked Baggie.

Baggie took another long drag on his cigarette. "I sure the fuck hope so," he replied. "I'd really like to go back to Billy with some form of a fucking answer."

"Yeah, dude, me and you both," Dawg replied solemnly.

They continued down the path, then Baggie stopped. To the left of the pair was an alley that turned at the end of it, leading to the other block, cutting around the back of a building. It wasn't very dark, which was rare of an alley in this neighborhood, with most of the buildings being six stories or more.

Baggie looked to the alley, then back to his friend. "Do you think she would've taken the alley?" he asked.

Dawg shrugged. "She knows this area good, she might have if she was in a hurry."

With a final sigh, Baggie and Dawg made their way into the shortcut. It was pretty bare, no one around, the walls lined with mostly trash cans next to back doors.

"Trash hasn't been taken yet," Dawg noted, seeing that each can was not only overflowing but had multiple bags lying next to them.

"So now we're trash pickers?" Baggie muttered as he lifted the lid to inspect the closest can.

Five cans later, they had found nothing relating to their search, only bad smells and rotten food with the exception of a dead cat Dawg had found and let out a shill scream when he saw.

Finally, at the end of the turn, Baggie kicked a trash bag and heard a scrape from the bottom of the bag. Though he thought it was nothing, he figured it was worth it to see what it was. What did he have to lose at this point?

What lied beneath the bag was a cell phone, resembling the ones that the members of the SBE carried.

"Yo, Dawg!" Baggie called. "Think I got something!" Baggie moved around a couple of more bags and found a small backpack and a set of keys with a pepper spray keychain.

The leather backpack, they knew was one that Hansen usually took with her to her day shifts at The Four Roses, she kept a change of clothes for when she got off and a butterfly knife in the side pocket. The keychain had seven keys: four silver house keys, a key with flames on it, one with roses, and a car key, along with the can of pepper spray that carried with her for protection, and two silver letter key chains, a "B" and an "H".

"Those have got to be hers," Dawg said as he inspected the items with Baggie. Baggie handed over the bag and keys to Dawg, looking over the cell phone. It was scratched and dead, but the screen wasn't cracked. It had to be hers, it was the same as all the SBE members carried.

"Yo, let me see your phone," Baggie told Dawg. Dawg reached into his pocket and pulled it out. Baggie then proceeded to pop off the backs of the two phones and replaced her dead battery with the working one. When it powered up, Baggie checked the call list and contact list.

"It's hers," he concluded, seeing all of the members' numbers and a million missed calls from Billy's number. Baggie then pulled out his own phone and was about to dial Billy before they were interrupted

"What are you shitbirds doing?!" someone yelled. Dawg and Baggie both looked up to find an old man coming out of one of the back doors, walking towards them. "I'm sick of you junkies always rifling through the trash! We don't need none of you around here!"

"Whoa there, Pops," Dawg calmed the man. "We're not junkies, we're looking for our friend."

"In the trash?" he asked disbelievingly.

"Nah," Baggie stepped in. "She's been missing for a few days. She usually takes this way to work and this is her stuff. We're just trying to find her."

"Oh," the old man said, more calm now that he knew they weren't rifling for unwanted treasures.

"You seen anything like that around here a couple of days ago?" Baggie continued.

"Well, about two days ago, I saw a girl get thrown into the back of a car, but I just figured she was some druggie who owed money," he told them. "Shit like that happens around here more times than not."

"Can you tell us what happened?"

"Well, I usually see her walking this way, I recognized the backpack," he told them. "She seemed in a hurry, was probably because some kid was following her."

"Who was following her?" Dawg asked this time.

"Some local kid, was wearing a red bandana around his neck, the way John Wayne wears in the old western movies," he said. "He followed her, but then when she turned the corner, he cut down the alley. He caught up with her at the street and then some car pulled up and they shoved her in."

"What kind of car?"

"Big black one, looked like the ones cops use," he said.

"Like a Ford Crown Victoria?"

"Yeah, like that. Well, he put her in the car. Then some other guy got out of the driver's side and handed him some money. Then they sped off, leaving the kid behind."

Baggie and Dawg looked at one another, communicating wordlessly. They had something. Hell, they had gold.

"Thanks a lot, man," Baggie told the older man.

"No problem, I hope you find your friend," he said. Baggie and Dawg started to walk away, heading back to the car to report back to the Office.

"Wait a sec!" the old man called again. Baggie and Dawg turned back to him. "That kid, he's a little punk-shit, always getting into trouble. He's usually hanging out at the basketball courts all night with a bunch of other little punks."

Baggie nodded, pulling out his cell and waving to the guy.

_"What?" _Billy answered after hte first ring.

"Hey, man," Bodie said. "We got something."

* * *

Would love to write a personal little thank you note to all my king reviewers of the last chapter, but it's 3am and I have to be up at 6, so... Thank you now, and thank you for the review I know you're getting ready to send!

-Ollie


	11. Pieces Falling Into Place

**A/N: Ok, so I know I am the SUCKIEST person in the WHOLE WORLD for not updating sooner! Little update on me: Had a baby, got married (in the opposite order lol), just moved into my new house, and now trying to go back to school. **

**But enough about me, you wanna hear about Billy and Hansen, I'm sure! So here you go...**

**(Disclaimer: I do not own anything reconizable. Just Hansen, really. Oh, and Bailee.)  
**

* * *

Billy walked out of the corner store, lighting a cigarette from the new pack he has just bought, and made his way to his car.

"Darley!" a female voice called before he could even put his key in the lock. Billy turned to the caller, coming face to face with Detective Wallace.

"And what can I do for you today, _Detective_?" Billy asked, practically sneering at the title.

"Have you heard about the recent crime wave that has swept over our streets?" the woman asked casually.

"Nope," Billy told her. "Haven't had much time to read the paper, really."

"Well," she continued, crossing her arms in front of her chest, "seems like all the lowlifes in my jurisdiction seem to be dropping dead, with no real link-"

"Sounds like someone's doing your job for you," Billy interrupted. "And doing it better. I really wouldn't be complaining if I was you."

"The only real link they have," the detective continued, ignoring his input, "is that all of them are known members of local gangs, but none are members of the SBE. And you can see how that might raise some questions."

"What can I say?" Billy told her calmly. "We've turned a new leaf; been playing nice these days."

"Yeah," she said, unbelieving. "Or maybe the reason the SBE hasn't been falling victim to this recent spree is because you're the ones orchestrating it."

"Now, we both know if you had any proof of that, I'd already be in handcuffs," Billy said impatiently. "So, if you'll excuse me, I have things to do." Billy turned to get back into his car.

"Heard your girl is missing."

Billy slammed the car door shut with much more force than necessary and faced the detective again, anger pumping through his veins.

"She's outta town, visiting family," Billy told her, already feeling his blood starting to boil.

"Family?" she asked incredulously. "She grew up in a group home. She was an orphan before you took her in."

"What 's it to you where she's at?" Billy accused.

"Word is that she was taken and that it has something to do with Mikey Nuryan's death," she told him.

"Well it doesn't," Billy lied. "She's fine."

"Whatever you say, Darley," she said before turning to leave.

Billy watched her retreating back, a million questions running through his head, though the fact that he had no answers rang out the loudest. That and the sound of her frightful scream in his dream.

"Wait," Billy called, having a feeling he was going to regret this at one point.

The detective stopped and turned to face Billy again. She didn't say anything, waiting for him to start.

"What makes you think Hansen's in any way connected to what happened to Mikey?" Billy asked. "I'm not saying she is, I just want to know."

Detective Wallace walked back over to him. "You of all people should know, Darley, everything comes with a price. Especially mistakes."

"What are you talkin' about?" Billy asked suspiciously.

"A witness came forward saying they saw someone matching Hansen's description being loaded into the back of a black car. They got the license plate number and the car is registered to a man that came to the morgue a few days ago to identify the body of an OD victim-"

"I'm still waiting to hear how all this is connected," Billy told her.

"The victim OD'd from a bad batch of heroin. And the man who identified her was her boyfriend," the detective finished.

That's when it clicked. The lethal cut of dope that Mikey has stolen from B-Street, and sold it as SBE product. The wrong girl bought it and it killed her. Now there was someone looking for vengeance. Everyone pays for their mistakes, and sometimes other people paid for them as well.

"Who's the boyfriend?" Billy asked, though he knew he was pushing his luck.

"You know I can't tell you that, Darley," Detective Wallace sighed. "But I can tell you to stay out of this. We've almost got this cracked."

"If you know who it is, then why you still sniffing around for clues?" Billy pushed.

"We haven't been able to find him," she admitted unwillingly. "But we will. Just, please, Darley, let us do our job."

Billy heard the pleading tone, but it was lost on deaf ears. No way was he leaving this to the police.

"Yeah, 'cause you guys have been doing a great job," Billy bit back sarcastically. Then turned and got back into his car. Though he hated to admit it, Detective Wallace just helped him out quite a bit. He finally had the first clue in finding Hansen, and bringing her back to the safety of his arms.

As soon as he pulled away, his cell phone rang.

"What?" Billy answered impatiently.

"We got something," Bodie told him.

"I'm on my way," Billy replied before hanging up the phone and tossing it back into his pocket.

* * *

Billy pulled up in front of the Office, immediately noticing the van and Bodie's car were there. Slamming the car into park and cutting the engine, Billy stomped up the stairs and up to the cook room.

Bodie met him at the top of the stairs, a spark of triumph and hope in his eye.

"What d'ya got?" Billy asked him, trying to be patient, but not doing a great job at it.

"Baggie and Dawg found Hansen's backpack, keys, and phone in the trash in an alley on Hansen's way to work. Some old guy who lives in one of the buildings told them he saw Hansen being loaded into the back of a Crown Vic by some punk and then someone got out of the car and handed him some cash and they sped off," Bodie told him quickly as they walked to the next floor. "Old guy also told us where this kid likes to hang. Baggie and Dawg picked him up on the way back here."

"Where's Hansen's stuff?" Billy asked.

"In the chapel," Bodie told him.

"And the kid?"

"The back room," Bodie said. "I figured he wasn't walkin' outta here, so he's near the back door."

Billy nodded. "I'll deal with him in a minute," he said, then made his way to the chapel.

Bodie didn't questions Billy when he decided to go to the chapel before interrogating the "witness". He had known him long enough to know how much this was really getting to him. He had been there since the beginning, seen the way that things had changed when it came to her. Billy loved her, and Bodie had known it before he did.

_Bodie sat with Billy in his car, across the street from a small all-night convenience store, ski masks poised on top of their heads, ready to cover their faces. They were ready for this, had been awaiting it for what seemed like their whole lives. Initiation Night, their coming of age ritual, the night boys like them became men. It was a nasty process, but it proved a lot. At least to the people around here. _

_Billy let out another drag of his cigarette, watching the long stream of continuous grey smoke. "Hey, Bodie, can I ask you somethin'?" he asked, mumbling a little._

"_Yeah, dude," Bodie replied, taking another drag from his own cigarette. _

"_Will you do somethin' for me?"_

"_Anything," Bodie told him. "You know that, dawg."_

_Billy started fidgeting with the Celtic cross that hung from the leather cord around his neck. "If anything happens tonight-"_

"_Ain't nothin' gonna go wrong," Bodie cut in._

"_But if it does," Billy continued. "Can you make sure Hansen gets this?" He indicated the cross. Bodie stared at him for a moment, a slight smirk on his face. _

"_Of course, bro," Bodie told him in a serious tone. Then, with a slight laugh in his voice, "Never thought Billy Darley would fall in love."_

"_Me neither," Billy said jokingly, but Bodie knew that it was a confession of sorts. "There's just somethin' about her. I can count on her, and she's never judged me for the things she knows I do. But then she still has the balls to stand up to me. No one else does that." He let out a disbelieving chuckle. "I don't know, man. She's just different."_

_Bodie heard the casual tone, but knew the sincerity behind it. "I promise you, man, Hansen will always be protected," he swore. _

Now, three years later, he had broken that promise, and all he could do was watch his best friend systematically break down.

* * *

Billy wasn't sentimental. He just didn't have it in him. Whether it was due to being a gang leader, always having to have an aura of steel, or whether it was just due to him being a guy, period. He just didn't see the point of attaching himself to objects. He kept people close, not things. But Hansen did. Almost everything she owned she associated with a memory; from the backpack Billy now held in his hands – a gift from Joe when he and Hansen had gone up to the University – to the wallet inside of the bag, which had once been Billy's and she had confiscated it for her own when she gave him a new leather one with his initials embossed on it for their first Christmas at the apartment.

Billy also didn't enjoy pictures like she did. She had filled every room in the apartment with pictures of the three of them and various other friends when they had moved in – much to the disagreement of Billy. He kept memories in his head, not plastered on the walls or held in decorative frames. He only kept two pictures: One was of him and Joe when they were younger that had been in his wallet, the safest place he could think of, since he found it when he was eleven, buried in an old drawer in Bones' bedroom.

The other was of Hansen, and, truth be told, she was the one who had put it in there when she gave him the wallet. It was taken a few months after he had been initiated, she was leaning against the front of his car, wearing just a simple tank top and jeans, blowing out the smoke from a drag she had just taken from her cigarette, and looking at some random object off in the distance. It was his favorite picture of her, her in all of her simplistic, natural beauty.

Those pictures were the ones Billy kept. Hansen only kept one picture, always in the same spot: In the clear spot in front of her ID card. It was the first picture of the three of them together, before they had moved in together and before Billy had been initiated, before him and Hansen had been anything more than friends; the three of them were sitting outside an all-night McDonalds after a night of partying, Hansen was in the middle of the two brothers with her arms draped around their shoulders. Joe had taken the photo, holding the camera from them with his arm outstretched.

She had told him it was her favorite picture, her first family portrait. It was always in her wallet, she carried it everywhere. So when he opened the tri-fold and he saw her ID card, he was confused. There was no way Hansen would have taken that picture out of her wallet. That means whoever took her took the picture, too. But why take an old picture when they had the girl?

* * *

"Hold on a fuckin' second, I'm coming!" Joe yelled, pulling on a pair of sweat pants and making his way to the door. Whoever it was pounded again as Joe reached for the door knob.

Joe stopped his hand, halfway to the knob and thought twice. Instead, he opened the drawer to the table next to the door and pulled out the gun that was kept there. Leaning against the door with both hands, gun in one, Joe peered through the peephole. He was met with pitch black.

Joe opened the door, keeping the chain on and sticking the gun through the space, finding nobody there. Confused, he looked down the hallway. Not a soul in sight. Looking back at the door, he saw what had been blocking the peephole: A large brown envelope taped to the door. He pulled it down and closed the door, making sure it was fully locked again.

He walked back to his room. Bailee sat there, staring up at him, in his pajamas with a blanket wrapped around her. Joe held up the package, "BILLY DARLEY" written in large, black letters across it.

"Get dressed," he sighed. "We gotta go see Billy."

* * *

_Stupid kid_, Billy thought to himself as he continued to try and scrub his hands. _Fucking blood. Shit never comes off._

It had practically been another dead end. The punk that Baggie and Dawg had picked up at the basketball court had given them next to nothing. The guy who paid him to bring him Hansen was _maybe_ six foot, had _kinda darkish_ hair, and a Boston accent. Yeah, that had narrowed it down to about seventy percent of the city. They had searched the kid, finding nothing but a pretty good sized stack of cash and few baggies of coke and weed. No picture. Billy was reaching the breaking point. Again.

"Yo, Billy!" Bodie called from the other side of the bathroom door where Billy was taking his frustration out on his hands.

"What?" Billy asked, trying hard not to explode. He needed to think, not freak. Bodie didn't say anything, just pointed to the window. Looking down, Billy felt a wave of severe annoyance mixed with dread pass through him.

"Fuck!" he swore through clenched teeth at the sight of the car parked in front of the building. "I'll take care of this."

Billy took the stairs two at a time, rushing to get to the second floor, the faster he was, the faster this would be over. He crouched behind one of the counters, pulling back a sheet to reveal a safe. He quickly spun the dial and opened it up. Hearing the voice of the intruder coming up the stairs, Billy threw the stacks of money into the backpack sitting there, adding the stack they found on the kid upstairs, hoping that would help. Then he pulled his gun from his waistband, placing it in the small gab between the top of the safe and under the counter.

Standing up, Billy kept one had on his gun and one on the backpack. He knew this wasn't going to be an easy meeting. They never were.

"Where is the Nazi prick?" Bones yelled, stepping into the cook room. "Oh! There's the little shit now. Where the fuck ya been, Billy-boy?"

"Busy," Billy stated simply. "Here's your money." He threw the backpack at him.

"'Busy', huh?" Bones asked, snatching the backpack out of the air and examining the contents. "Obviously not busy on the fucking corners, getting my money. Which is where the lot of yous belong."

"Look, you got your money," Billy told him, uninterested in hearing this lecture. Again.

Bones scoffed. "Whatever, you fucking punk. Don't make me come chase your ass down again," he warned. "Or you won't have to worry about finding your little orphan bitch. Can't be looking for someone while your six feet under."

Billy's head snapped. "What the fuck do you know about that?"

Bones scoffed. "You ain't the only one with ears around this city," he told him. "You know, I don't know how you get these little piss-ants to follow you around like you're King Shit or somethin'. You can't even keep a piece of pussy safe."

Billy was starting to lose control over his temper. "I said, what the _fuck _do you know about it?"

"Probably a good thing that bitch was taken," Bones continued, ignoring his question again. "I only wish it'd happened sooner. Mark my words _son_, she ain't nothin' but trouble waiting to happen."

"You don't know shit about her!" Billy yelled.

"Don't need to," he said with the upmost confidence. "They're all the same and if you think she's somethin' different, you're dead wrong. Just another gutter slut from this shithole of a city. She'll bail on you one day. Just like your bitch mother."

That was it. All Billy saw was red. "Shut your fucking mouth," he told him through clenched teeth, and in a flash, he pulled his gun from its hiding spot and pointed it right between Bones' eyes. "You don't know nothing. Not about Ma and not about Hansen. So just _shut up_."

"Whoa-ho! Someone thinks they're tough shit now, huh?" Bones leaned forward over the table until the barrel of the gun was pressing against his forehead. "C'mon kid, do it. Show everyone of these little fucks what Big Bad Billy Darley is fucking made of."

"Billy?" Billy looked up to the doorway to find Joe standing there, Bailee behind him. He had the same look on his face he used to get when they were kids and watched Bones beat on their mom, then Billy after she took off. Bones took this moment of distraction to take back the upper hand. He grabbed Billy's wrist that held the gun and slammed it on the table, causing Billy to lose the grip he had on his weapon. He grabbed the front of Billy's shirt and pulled him close to his face.

Billy looked his father straight in the eye. "Don't ever pull a gun on me unless you got the balls to pull the fucking trigger, you little fuck," Bones warned him. He let go of Billy's wrist and shoved him back. He grabbed the backpack and turned to leave. Joe watched his father pass him by without a word or even a glance at his youngest son.

Joe looked to ground, fighting the feeling of unworthiness that was creeping into his chest, a feeling that he always associated with Bones. Instead, he swallowed the lump in his throat and turned to Billy.

"What are you doin' here, Joey?" Billy asked his brother, lighting a cigarette. "I told you to stay home with Bailee."

"This came for you," he told him, holding up the brown package.

* * *

**And just when I update, I leave a cliffhanger! Oh, I totally suck! But, please, tell me what you think! And XNegAttentionX where is your update? **

**Thanks again to all my patient readers! **

**Love, Ollie**


End file.
